Misogynism

Just as a point of course, I am a white middle aged strait man, and i feel like that is something society is trying to make me be ashamed of.

Some people are systematically oppressed while others are not. That doesn't mean people who aren't oppressed don't have problems. It just means they don't face systematic oppression from society as a whole. It isn't a case of "my problems are worse than yours." It's a case of the fact that systematic problems can be fixed with systematic change to positively impact everyone. Personal problems have to be handled personally with people who care about you. They aren't rooted in society, so a change in society won't fix them. Like I said before: feminism is about dismantling the patriarchy. When the patriarchy is dismantled, men will also be able to report rapes. To be fair though, many women are told not to report rapes as well. So the statistics might not be all that skewed since everyone is told to be silent about rape.

Society isn't trying to make white middle ages straight men feel ashamed. Oppressed groups that don't have as much societal power want people in privileged groups to start realizing the ways they contribute to systems of oppression, whether on purpose or on accident, and take responsibility so we can move toward equality.

And yet, I am a member of that group that is the poster child for oppression. A fact of which I am being constantly reminded.

If I am "privileged" everyone else must be in a real mess.

You would have more people on your side if you didn't blame all of society. While the problem exists within our society the problem is not our society in and of itself. Instead of an, "everyone should help us, and feel bad for us, and change for us" stance one of being more proactive yourself and trying to solve the issues of everyone that exist within society would be more effective.

In short, don't try to prove society wrong, instead try to lead through a good example. Otherwise you are just telling other people what to do and how they should think.

May the Force be with you,
Rai

If the most you are oppressed is by being told that you belong to groups with systematic power, you probably aren't actually oppressed. I am a straight white middle class male, and I have no problem recognizing that I am privileged in those parts of my life. That doesn't mean I never have a bad day. It doesn't mean I can't be seriously hurt or that my life will be perfect. It only means I start out ahead of, say a black lower class bisexual woman.

I am also constantly reminded of how I am privileged, but I don't see that as a bad thing. I see that as a reason to support people who are systematically oppressed because I have more systematic power than they do.

Say what you want about it, but there are no special interest groups out there for me. Clubs or scholarships that only applied to me would be racist or sexist.

What about the hundreds of qualified people who were turned down for jobs during affirmative action because they were straight white men, supposedly not a minority, and the employer had to hire a certain percentage of minorities?

Don't get me wrong. I believe everyone should have an equal opportunity.

I believe everyone should receive the help they need.

It's hard to feel like a "majority" when the majority of minorities seek to handicap you.

I can honestly tell you that not every white middle aged man has gotten what they have by being born a certain way. Most of us have had to scrape and struggle our way to where we are.

I think a lot of that was covered in that older thread titled feminism. There is good and bad affirmative action policy. No-one is stopping male rights movements, but if it's done badly it will not get very far. Feminism was and is still successful, but it did not happen overnight, and not all of it is good and some of it is bad. This thread was pointing out about misogyny at the forum, not mans rights.

How many qualified people honestly didn't get hired during affirmative action? Or was it just the mediocre people getting ousted for more qualified minorities who weren't being considered?

As far as special interest groups and clubs, you are welcome almost anywhere in society. If there are a few clubs that are meant to be safe spaces for people who face violence and oppression, so be it. It's really not a huge deal. I don't belong in black student organizations, but there are plenty of other places where I am a majority that I can easily go to.

Yes, most people have to work hard to get what they have. But some people start with an advantage.

I like it when people tell me I "had it easy"