Jedi and Sexual Orientation

It does seem the case that a disproportionate number of people here identify as being something other than heterosexual. I've probably met more non-straight people at TOTJO than I have knowingly met in my whole life outside of the Temple.

I think it probably has something to do with the air of acceptance and tolerance here. We know that everyone here is our friend and that we do not have to worry about a negative reaction.

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I guess the conclusion that I'm drawing isn't that heterosexual people don't want to be Jedi. It's that a lot less people fall into the 'straight' category than we might believe. Perhaps some would say that that sounds idealistic and delusional...but in the last few weeks alone I have discovered that about 5 people who I believed to be heterosexual in fact identify with other orientations. So already my beliefs regarding how many heterosexual people I know have been challenged and duly adjusted.

Of all the jedi orders/communities I've experienced I think totjo is by far the most open when it comes to sexuality. We can pretty much talk about anything without "emotional interference" that would normally lead to arguments... and I think it is very Jedi of us.

I've made this observation as well, and I pretty much agree with what everyone else has said..

I generally consider myself straight (but, then again, only Sith deal in absolutes! :laugh: ), since everyone else seems to be saying theirs.

Locksley wrote:
'Gut reactions' to things like this are generally uneducated and based solely off of uninformed prejudice caused by peer pressure, home life values, media portrayals or even simple lack of exposure to the situation first hand.... it is solely learned social prejudice that has created an atmosphere of disgust or fear regarding non-heterosexual couplings.

Another thought of mine...

We see straight romance scenes in all types of Hollywood films, ranging from adventure to Sci-Fi to Comedy, and even horror. Whenever I see these types of scenes, honestly, I think "Ho, that's sexy!"

But, occasionally, I have seen homosexual romance scenes in certain movies (usually foreign movies),

and my mind instantly thinks "Eww..."
But then I quickly re think about it and my view slightly changes to, "Well, that's their choice and personality..."


Like I've said in my previous post, my mind logically tells me that there isn't anything wrong with homosexual romance. But my emotional heart immediately feels grossed out for a few minutes. Am I biased? HELL YES. But does that make me a piggish bigot? Not really.
(And thank you all for not calling me that after my first post! I appreciate your understanding )



Here's what's also strange. Straight, "normal" people enjoy seeing heterosexual, straight romance and sex scenes in Hollywood movies.

But in every straight couple, there is one person who matches your own gender! Does this reflect a slightly homosexual belief in every sex-interested human being? How do we know that we're only enjoying seeing the person (in that couple) of the opposite sex making out?


I'm interested to see how people will respond to that!

I've never really thought about it before, but you are right. I guess it's not such a big deal for me so I never realize it. But I can say that this site is a very comfotable place. Text hidden from guests:


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So, in overview, i'd say that this site has a great, supportive community of anyone regardless of their sexual orientation. I may have missed it, but so far, i've never seen anyone put another person down because of their orientation. Even anyone who has been gender-confused hasn't received any negativity. I give everyone here a standing ovation...except Jester...because I know he prefers cookies

Well everyone knows that I'm gay so repeating that shouldn't be a big surprise (and if it is...where have you been?!?! lol). I was slightly concerned about mentioning it when I first joined TOTJO in the same way that I've been a bit cautious when starting a new job, or meeting new friends. Over the years, this caution has lessened as I have grown in confidence and society itself has evolved to become more accepting. And it was soon very evident that TOTJO is a very accepting place.

We don't discriminate against people for any reason (unless they're being a total arse, in which case we call them out on it!) and I would hope that everyone feels comfortable enough to be themselves here. As ren said, we're (hopefully) very Jedi!

I also believe that communities such as this, that support and uplift rather than divide and denigrate, contribute more than we might think to a compassionate future. People knowing my sexuality used to be a bigger deal but nowadays I don't even regard it as being anything significantly different until someone mentions it. "I am what I am...." (a song choice I admit is a bit flaming... lol)

It's like my tattoos - I've had a large one on my leg (*ahem*) for around 17 years and don't even notice it any more. But when I wear shorts and someone points it out, it brings it back to my attention. I've been "out" since I was 14 (so...er...21 years ago. Dammit I feel old....) and I suppose I've got used to it by now. Places like this have helped to support that comforting belief that it's really nothing special. There's no need to make a big deal of it any more than there is a need to ridicule it.

At times this is challenged, particularly when there is evident discrimination and that's when I get militant and proactive. I will still fight to protect rights and people and to proclaim my "pride", as and when I need to. But I truly feel that the world is evolving to a point where all people are respected despite, or perhaps even because of, their uniqueness.

I'm happy that this Temple is such a place and I love you all, whatever you are or want to be

This may sound slightly bizarre, but who cares ? for it is basically the truth about me as I experienced it :

I don't really know about gay/straight, or other sexual divisions. Sure, I'm a homosexual, if one considers that "homo" is taken to mean 'same' or "Man". Essentially, I can find physical intimacy with either sex/gender pleasant. Why shouldn't one ?

As Sean pointed out, when seeing images of what we've learnt not to accept for ourselves, a primary reaction may be "Eww ..." This comes off as short-sighted from either perspective. And there are many on both sides that go "eww".

It was at a bit later age that I was able to "come out" ; I was about 25. Of course this didn't stop me from having sex with both sexes from a much earlier age while I was figuring things out (or, perhaps letting my body figure things out for me -- whichever the case). And as with about everyone, while coming to terms with our sexual selves, we go through periods of trial and error wherein 'error' is quite predominant ; wherein we are comparing what we have learnt about how life is "supposed to be" with the way it's actually "turning out" to be. Guess what : it just keeps on "turning out" -- that doesn't stop .... EVER.

Should we be prudent about revealing our sexual selves to the rest of the world ? Well, of course. But this is not a big shock. People judge. Sometimes, often even, those in our OWN social/religious/sexual/'whatever the division' is group are the harshest judges of all. That all blends into the mess (messes can be very artistic, so just do whatever you can with that) of our judgements about ourselves which can be day to decade roller-coasters themselves. But what the hell, we're all on the same ride, just perhaps in different cars.

It is good that this topic comes up again (and again and again ...) for it let's us measure our acceptance level (toward ourselves and others) at different stages of our path. I'm not sure that anyone can ever be a good Jedi if one has not felt out where one is sexually. I'm not saying that it takes some lifelong, polysexual orgy to figure out if one is gay, straight or both (or neither, for that matter), but as least having explored the possibilities within oneself. Curious it is, how that is a box we like to open out of "tolerance" regarding others, but like to keep sealed away and hidden in our own spiritual attics.

To be up front and honest ... I have usually had more coherent sentimental attachments to other men than to women. But that said, there are women whom I love beyond the dreams of Venus, men whom I love to the depths of existence itself and the world whom I love with the devotion of Creation.

With every letter I write, it is a way of "making love" to every soul who reads it. So, go "aww" or "eww" as you might : I love you all.

your
Alexandre

I myself, am straight to an extent.

I love women completely, but I'm not against kissing a man/cuddling a man etc but I just wouldn't do anything sexual with a man because to me that's not attractive (not unattractive but just doesn't appeal to me)

A Jedi isn't straight, bi-sexual or homosexual/lesbian. We are what we are, not what we are required to be sexual orientation wise.

As V-Tog and others have said, we accept people for whom they are and what they are, a Jedi's sexual orientation isn't a judgment of their ability to be a Jedi.

We judge Jedi on their ability to be a Jedi, not what gender they're attracted too.

So perhaps we just attract more because there's no discrimination here for your sexual orientation.

So long as it is consensual and does no harm to another, I don't believe any given sex act is inherently immoral.

Since sex is a basic human urge/need, I tend to consider it in much the same way I do food. Much like different foods, some kinds of sex, such as those that occur within a loving, committed relationship, are healthier than others, such as a one night stand. Like food, sex can become unhealthy and addictive and cause health or interpersonal problems.

Beyond that, I see sexual preference, whether it be for certain genders, physical attributes or specific activities to be entirely a matter of personal taste. I happen to prefer women to men in much the same way that I prefer steak to mushrooms, yet I have no problem with those who have different sexual tastes any more than I have a problem with those who prefer mushrooms. I find it just as ludicrous to hate or discriminate against a person who has a different sexual orientation as I would to hate or discriminate against those who do not share my tastes in food.

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