Jedi up

Carlos.Martinez3 wrote: So - as a family , if we see , as a family , that as we speak - to the family , if it hurts some - not all - maybe it’s time change the approach?

Hey - I’m jedi ing up - right ?

No. If a family member has a problem with me telling them they should "Jedi Up" or "Man Up" or whatever. I would sit them down and explain to them why it is I say it and that I am not going to change my way because they choose to be sensitive. Instead, i am going to continue to challenge them to be the best part of themselves because I know they can do it and I will be by there side the whole time.

Not everything is solved with pandering to emotions but instead accomplished by pushing past our discomforts and rising to the occasion.

Trisskar wrote:

Carlos.Martinez3 wrote: So - as a family , if we see , as a family , that as we speak - to the family , if it hurts some - not all - maybe it’s time change the approach?

Hey - I’m jedi ing up - right ?

No. If a family member has a problem with me telling them they should "Jedi Up" or "Man Up" or whatever. I would sit them down and explain to them why it is I say it and that I am not going to change my way because they choose to be sensitive. Instead, i am going to continue to challenge them to be the best part of themselves because I know they can do it and I will be by there side the whole time.

Not everything is solved with pandering to emotions but instead accomplished by pushing past our discomforts and rising to the occasion.

Not disagreeing at all
And that is one way - your way of your choose- to solve problems. Gladly there IS more than one way. Glad to know yours!

Carlos.Martinez3 wrote: So - as a family , if we see , as a family , that as we speak - to the family , if it hurts some - not all - maybe it’s time change the approach?

Hey - I’m jedi ing up - right ?

No, I dont agree here. Just because my uncle and grandfather were alcoholics and hurt people with that does not mean I cant enjoy a scotch now and then. It means I ought to be careful with alcohol because it runs in the family but not that I cant partake.

Its the same with this phrase. It means we now see it can be misused/misunderstood so we should take care we are using it with good intent and ensuring that we are making the context clear when we use it. If we are unsure even PM the person or take extra time to clarify what we mean in further posts.

The baby ought not to be tossed out with the bathwater just because the water might be murky. We just need to ensure our water is clear before we pour it over the babe. To clarify the example, ensure our intent is good and that if we are unsure we make sure to clarify that it was shorthand for whatever out good intent was.

Edit
For the sake of clarity Carlos, I am not bashing you. I just dont agree with where you take the info gathered. To me saying maybe we should try something else is similar to saying hey let's ban booze because some people drink too much.
Your post was good. We gained good info from it. Were we dont agree is in what we do with the info. I dont toss something that could be dangerous just because it could be risky. But I am careful with its use and it calls for greater mindfulness during handling.

MadHatter wrote:

Carlos.Martinez3 wrote: So - as a family , if we see , as a family , that as we speak - to the family , if it hurts some - not all - maybe it’s time change the approach?

Hey - I’m jedi ing up - right ?

No, I dont agree here. Just because my uncle and grandfather were alcoholics and hurt people with that does not mean I cant enjoy a scotch now and then. It means I ought to be careful with alcohol because it runs in the family but not that I cant partake.

Its the same with this phrase. It means we now see it can be misused/misunderstood so we should take care we are using it with good intent and ensuring that we are making the context clear when we use it. If we are unsure even PM the person or take extra time to clarify what we mean in further posts.

The baby ought not to be tossed out with the bathwater just because the water might be murky. We just need to ensure our water is clear before we pour it over the babe. To clarify the example, ensure our intent is good and that if we are unsure we make sure to clarify that it was shorthand for whatever out good intent was.

Edit
For the sake of clarity Carlos, I am not bashing you. I just dont agree with where you take the info gathered. To me saying maybe we should try something else is similar to saying hey let's ban booze because some people drink too much.
Your post was good. We gained good info from it. Were we dont agree is in what we do with the info. I dont toss something that could be dangerous just because it could be risky. But I am careful with its use and it calls for greater mindfulness during handling.

I like the old timer mentality ! So - I don’t feel bashed my fellow Jedi at all. I’m simply trying to see where - all- this phrase is and can be used and In what way- is all. I like good discussion , especially when it reveals many sides of the same coin! *wink!

Jedi up... cowboy up... man up. It's all rather demeaning. As if to say, who you are isn't good enough.

No it's not.

It's telling you (rightly or wrongly) that you've failed to meet a standard. (whether you feel that the person letting you know this has any authority to determine the standard, or your ability to meet it, is for the moment, irrelevant)

Is the word failed demeaning? Probably, I'm not allowed to use it in my reports any more.

I'm not allowed to use the word "incompetent" to describe incompetence any more. I have to say "would benefit from additional guidance"

Do people here use it usefully? probably not. Not a useful bunch of people here.

but, aside from the failure of this community to resemble any group of people who strive towards a noble ideal, there's nothing wrong with gentle chiding (call it encouragement if you prefer) from your peers when you have (temporarily or continually) fallen below an expectation.

@JamesSand
In an environment surrounded by syncretic and empathetic Jedi, who is anyone to dictate a standard of behavior to another Jedi? To tell someone that their manner of behavior is unacceptable of a Jedi?
If everyone's path is different how can you dictate what Jediism is to any other person? Let alone tell someone that their Jedi path is wrong simply because it doesn't fall into line with yours?

@JamesSand
In an environment surrounded by syncretic and empathetic Jedi, who is anyone to dictate a standard of behavior to another Jedi? To tell someone that their manner of behavior is unacceptable of a Jedi?
If everyone's path is different how can you dictate what Jediism is to any other person? Let alone tell someone that their Jedi path is wrong simply because it doesn't fall into line with yours?

Oh, I hope you're asking and that is not rhetorical.

Even anarchists have standards - if you want to sit around and say "no one is in any position to condone or condemn anyone for anything ever" you might have to do it entirely alone.

We can't even sit around in a green field and enjoy each others company, because one person will lay a big ol turd in the middle - who is to condemn their path? you either just say OMNNNNN! louder in your own head, or move to a different paddock. (if you feel I'm being scatalogical for no real reason, would you prefer "someone will decide to put up a statue of a great Jedi pioneer, only to have other Jedi 40 years down the track redefine what it is to be a symbol of the culture and desire to tear it down" )


Either you have some kind of COMMUNITY GOAL THING, or you don't have a community. This doesn't mean everyone has to be in lock-step, using the correct newspeak at all times, it just means at least agree who is on the same team.

If Jedi are so dead set on being non-exclusive that they can't agree on the spelling of the sign out of the front of their house, I'm not sure there is any point to them at all.



Moving forward, most of this (and other?) "Jedi" community problems could be solved by not calling themselves Jedi, because then the community can craft expectation for members from the ground up, rather than members "wandering in" with their own existing definition, and throwing their rattle out of the pram when someone else disagrees.

So Sayeth James Von Sand, Exarch of the Teapot Ninjas, Antipodean Territories.

Have you ever noticed that in a community such as this one, the more talk there is of people needing to act a certain kind of way, the less people actually do, because people are too busy defending or convicting about it. Ever heard of a classroom that knows its supposed to be quiet because the teacher said so, but as soon as one person makes a peep, one person says "shhh", followed by another person shushing them, and onward until the entire classroom is up in heaps of students shushing one another. It has created more chaos by trying to acknowledge and fix it.

On another point. perhaps the ideas around what is right and wrong about someone's behavior are not universal. Instead, I tend to think of right and wrong in manner of what works for a particular circumstance. You can talk like an asshole to somepeople and they will respect you, because they speak your language. In that context, it is constructive (and constructive outcomes are what we usually want out of an experience, right?). If you behave like an asshole to someone who doesn't speak the language (for this example), and they are 3 times your size, you're probably going to regret it soon after (just to be clear that would have been a destructive outcome, resulting in pretty much nothing but a black eye and/or broken nose). I think the same thing takes place here. Learn when to say the right things at the right time toward the right people and you won't be wasting your breath.

Proteus wrote: Learn when to say the right things at the right time toward the right people and you won't be wasting your breath.

This I feel is the best summation of effective communication that I've ever read.

Learn how to always be right and youll never be wrong.

Learn to be perfect and youll never make a mistake again.

Learn how to do something that is literally impossible for you to do right now and youll be doing far more than youve ever done before!