Gray Jedi

I am experiencing dark thoughts and in a dark state of mind, I feel as if I am more of a gray Jedi I would like to practice in both Jedi and sith ways but would not join either. Nobody seems to listen to me which angers me. any feedback could help


- Vet Durtall

Ok if you want my feedback on the Grey Jedi stuff , i can be very clear , i don't believe in GrayJedi , you are either a Jedi or you are not , there is enough room within the parameters of studying Jediism to explore oneself as a whole human being with valuable capacities and/or frustrating limitations. To become whole again and see where your priorities are ultimately decide whether you are a Jedi or a Sith , being of Service , or getting what you want. And even those can intertwine with Jedi getting what they want and Sith being of service , obviously,,, but always just my opinion.

Emotion, yet Peace.
Ignorance, yet Knowledge.
Passion, yet Serenity,
Chaos, yet Harmony.
Death, yet the Force.

This Code shows that, as humans, we can have the first (arguably darker, more Sith-y) part and also the second (noticeably lighter, more Jedi-esque) part. TotJO is wonderful for it's individualist approach. But a Jedi is a Jedi, a colour (or shade) should not change that. It is a frame of mind, a way of being. Yes, I sometimes get a little ticked off from time to time. But it is the Jedi in me that takes a second, breathes, and moves forward as a Jedi would.

Think of it like this, when you own a company, you're a CEO. You can't be a Grey CEO. You can't be slightly part of the competition. You have to choose where your loyalties lie and go with it, or else one is not a very good CEO.

We have many here that identify as "Grey" (Gray, for the Americans here). But a Grey Jedi is just that, a Jedi that feels emotions they think a Jedi should not feel, but that's life. You will feel things. A Grey Jedi that acts "un-Jedi-ish" is not a Jedi. It is up to you to decide to become master of self and learn to recognise these feelings and emotions so that you may use them constructively, properly, and healthily.

Harbert wrote: I am experiencing dark thoughts and in a dark state of mind, I feel as if I am more of a gray Jedi I would like to practice in both Jedi and sith ways but would not join either. Nobody seems to listen to me which angers me. any feedback could help


- Vet Durtall

First off, it sounds like your in the process of finding/discovering yourself, and you came here to learn so your off on the right foot. Don't be put off by the opposites, their just that, and they exist within us all whether people acknowledge it or not. I used to be purely Sith, now, I'm whole. I acknowledge both, and function much better as a result. To deny one over the other is essentially to deny a part of ourselves.

There's a Cherokee legend that states everyone has two wolves inside them, the light and the dark. The one you feed is the dominant one. Feed both, and don't let others preach at you with how you should live your life. It takes a good amount of courage to be yourself. Pm me if you want to learn more, or just want to talk...

Zenchi hits it right on the head. These titles of Sith and Jedi are labels we assign based on our assumptions. In reality it is so rarely black and white. We all have tendencies from both. It is your actions that define you. It is your influence that will affect how others define you.

Harbert wrote: I am experiencing dark thoughts and in a dark state of mind.

What are dark thoughts? What is a dark state of mind. Less generalized labels, more sharing of your specific situation.

Harbert wrote: I feel as if I am more of a gray Jedi I would like to practice in both Jedi and sith ways but would not join either.

Then don't join. Problem solved. Or is there something else behind that statement?

Harbert wrote: Nobody seems to listen to me which angers me. any feedback could help

You have our attention HERE, NOW. What will you do with it?

You can share nothing, and get the fortune cookie one-size-fits-all answer, or you can share more about your specific situation and get specific feedback. Your move.

Don't let "Magnus" get to you, he's crotchety when he goes without his Metamucil... :laugh:

Everyone experiences dark thoughts and emotions, it's part of being human. Even the highest priest or most devout monk will feel these things, to not feel is to lose part of your humanity.

Part of Jediism is to understand this fact and to learn how to rise above it and control it. I, myself, have issues with pride and anger and I work on those daily, and some days it's worse than others, and it may never quite truly end because as we become immune to one approach, our internal darkness will try another way in, or we will let our guard down thinking that we are okay for a little bit and can relax.

I used to feel as through I walked that moral tightrope, for what others considered grey, and what I got of it was that I was looking at things the wrong way. I view those in that field as those willing to allow some sway to their emotion, a bit more freedom in that aspect, but I found that it's not really a truth in that I learned that you can listen to your emotions, the important thing is not to be overcome by them.

Several have asked for clarity as to what you view as dark thoughts, and it is something to be said of knowing the nature of those thoughts to provide guidance. A rule of thumb that I follow when I have intrusive thoughts or hear the call of the void is to step back and give it a moment to pass and then re-approach the issue. If I have negative and strong thoughts others, I step back and try to learn where they are coming from, what part of me is calling for those emotions, and then try to see where it wants me to go. A good example is a desire to spite someone or take swipes at them online. I step back, try to figure out what's driving that emotion (usually pride which was wounded or anger from my last interaction with them) and then I re-evaluate what I want out of the conversation or if I even need to take part in the conversation at all.

Zenchi wrote: Don't let "Magnus" get to you, he's crotchety when he goes without his Metamucil... :laugh:

Coffee. Coffee keeps the darkness at bay. :laugh:

Magnus Staar wrote:

Zenchi wrote: Don't let "Magnus" get to you, he's crotchety when he goes without his Metamucil... :laugh:

Coffee. Coffee keeps the darkness at bay. :laugh:

GET THIS MAN A COFFEE TRANSFUSION! STAT!