Having some issues

As a member of the clergy, we are going to be asked to console others on matters that we do not have experience or first hand knowledge. I will try then to give you advise based on my understanding of humanity and the nature of people through the context of the Jedi Code

As I read the posts I could not help but think of the Jedi code.

There is no Emotion; there is Peace.
This is an emotional subject area, meditate on the peace that you will have upon confronting your sister and relieving the guessing that you now have.

There is no Ignorance; there is Knowledge.
In this context, Ignorance is in the lack of knowledge. You do not know what she wants and can never know unless you confront this situation.

There is no Passion; there is Serenity.
Your posts make you sound very determined in your opinion of your "family". Be calm, the will of the Force is most evident when we are at peace within ourselves.

There is no Chaos; there is Harmony.
Your "family" is in chaos! Bring harmony to you and your family. The only way in which this is possible is by talking with her and communicating honestly and openly.

There is no Fear; there is Courage.
Fear not the unknown! To Dream the Impossible Dream....

There is no Foolishness; there is Wisdom.
Wisdom can only be attained by cutting out this foolish fight within yourself.

There is no Death; there is the Force.
Your mother is not dead, she is with the Force. You cannot run away from this.


Peace Be With You Brother and May The Force Guide Your Path!

I'm just being speculative here and offering something for you to consider as I don't really know your whole situation. Perhaps her reason for being so persistent is because she has no other family left.

I have siblings and although we have drifted apart and for the most part don't see eye to eye, I still love them. Blood ties, especially to siblings are very strong. I don't think it would matter where we were in our own lives, that tie would always bind us in a way that we could never share with another human being as we share the same DNA. Now you might think it's different for me cause I grew up with them.

Well no, two of them, my older brother and sister, had a different mother and I didn't grow up with them. I only met them a handful of times when I was very young and I remember hating my older sister. But still that bond is there. If either one of them wanted to get in contact with me, I'd probably be wary, but I don't think I'd want to miss out on the opportunity. Especially if their intentions were pure.

Maybe that's something to consider as well.

Very good advice from everybody.

So, I have another question. If I ignore this situation, and just ask her to leave me alone, is that a solution that will hurt her or hurt me?

Having adopted a child who now is an adult I know there is a truck load of emotions in this situations. Experience has taught me that your mental health is most important and your primary responsibility. Take care of you first. I know you want to know about your birth mom and sister but they are strangers. You didn't choose to be put up for adoption. Obviously your birth mother wanted better for you than she could provide for you. You have a life different from what it would have been if not adopted. She wants you to do well and be well. They are not part of your life by choice. You feel strongly and that is good don't let your emotions rule over you exclusely. Proceed with caution. Peace

This is my predicament:

I want to know my medical history. My parents BOTH died under the age of 50. And, I want to know why. Because, I may be able to prevent it.

If this wasn't an issue, I wouldn't even ask about this. It wouldn't even be a question.

Connor my Brother...

I say to you once again...

There is no Ignorance, There Is Knowledge!

To ignore is not a Jedi Way! You must face your fears, you must face yourself! No matter what the outcome. You will never truly know yourself if a part of you is missing.

So far all I have seen is what you want out of it and what you don’t want out of it. And what I have noticed is that no matter what others say, you argue the point of not wanting to “deal” with your family. I acknowledge that there may be some resentment and underlying issues for you.

But life is not always about you or what you want. For your sisters sake, let me say that as Jedi we are here to serve.

Rickie the Grey is right. You have to take care of you. And who is to say that you don’t need this? I would not.

I also think that you brought this to open discussion because either you want someone to agree with you and say don’t do it… or, you want us to talk you in to it.

I will do neither. You are your own man and can make your own decisions. I will help you along the way, but this is something you have to decide for yourself.

Wescli is right on in his assessment. So I will validate what I have been saying to you Connor. I am not trying to talk you into anything either. I am telling you something that you already know... if you are following the Jedi Path. This fight is within yourself, and so, you must make the decision to either act in accordance to the Code that you have vowed or not. No person will judge you, but the ripples in your path will be the echos of the Force.

Phortis Nespin wrote: You must face your fears, you must face yourself! No matter what the outcome. You will never truly know yourself if a part of you is missing.

This has nothing to do with fear, I think.

And, I don't understand why a part of myself is missing. That doesn't make any sense.

Wescli Wardest wrote: So far all I have seen is what you want out of it and what you don’t want out of it. And what I have noticed is that no matter what others say, you argue the point of not wanting to “deal” with your family. I acknowledge that there may be some resentment and underlying issues for you.

Actually, I kind of want to know how to not die before 50 without having to create a relationship with my birth sister.

I'm realizing that this may not be possible.

And, I don't see how this couldn't be about what I want. Everything comes back to that.