Mad

Dude, we are practicing Jedi, not perfect Jedi...

We are gonna slip... Gonna mess up...

Just have to lecture ourselves, move on, and try harder to be how we want to be...

Forgive ourselves, as we would forgive another, and how we would like to forgive them....

rugadd wrote: I appreciate everyone's advice. It was just particularly frustrating for me because I thought I had forgiven and forgotten. It is hard to realize one is not as good at focusing on the positive as one has been trying to be. In those moments, all of the training, the meditation, the countless books and articles, they all seem to have been pointless. As if I had been lifting weights to be strong enough so that I couldn't be held down against my will, only to be knocked flat and held down anyway, despite all of my preparation.

Secondly, I come to question how I view myself as a Jedi in those moments. Would a Jedi want someone else to suffer just because they "deserve it"?

I must lecture myself because I'm known amongst my friends for saying there is a differance between sentiments and feelings. I tell them one can't help the sentiments that arise within us, but we can most certainly choose not to ask it to stay, feed it and carry it as a feeling. But in this case, the only thing between me and tossing that wolf a ham is the idea that it is wrong to do so.

I will just make up my mind that I forgive them...again...and get on with myself. I just wish it didn't ache so much.

You are very critical of yourself, and that's really who you are - I shouldn't tell you to be otherwise. As I've mentioned, just figure out the way you handle things the best and apply it to this situation.

Jestor wrote: Dude, we are practicing Jedi, not perfect Jedi...

We are gonna slip... Gonna mess up...

Just have to lecture ourselves, move on, and try harder to be how we want to be...

Forgive ourselves, as we would forgive another, and how we would like to forgive them....

Very good point. Thank you, Master Jestor.

I have a pretty nasty temper...depending on when you encounter me....

When something from the past comes back I remind myself that it's the past...it's over with and getting angry about it is pointless...then, most importantly I repeat this mantra as I walk away....f**kit...if that doesn't work....well then it's time to destroy the heavy bag until I can't lift my arms....

I was gonna post the suggestion to look at Basic Teaching number 7, but since your last post, perhaps that's not gonna do the trick now.

When I am frustrated I can't tell you how much better I feel out in nature after a trying day; it's like the negative energy just flows out of me watching a sunrise or standing in the shadow of a mountain.

I'm sure you'll find something that alleviates the anger. Hopefully, you've received something to guide you in this thread...

MTFBWY,
LTK

I wonder though (aside from all other comments): which is the better path: (1) finding a way to let it ooze away [supplantation, or the "watching sunrise" example], or (2) find a way to challenge it and defeat so it can't [maybe "won't"] come back on you when you're having a weak moment. One's passive, one's active. I'm not personally sure which is better in the long run (though both work in the short term). I can walk about 3/4 of a mile in your shoes, but yet: I have no better insight (seventeen years later, something is still holding on to me back from being free even though I already forgave the person). *Shrug* You pose a really good issue, Rugadd.

Forgiving is sometimes VERY hard. I would never advise anyone forget something. Letting go is a different story though.

I can’t tell you how to, but letting go of the pain which causes your anger would be the first step in healing I think. You may never be able to “forgive” someone… but there is no reason you should have to continually suffer.

Of course, I am always available if you would like someone to listen.

rugadd wrote: How does one stop being angry with someone?

I honestly have no idea. That's something I've never been able to reconcile. I still hold grudges against bullies from school, even though it's been over a decade, even though I'm a Jedi of sorts.

Oddly enough I recently had a laptop stolen, so I imagine that if I never see it again, I'll be angry at the thief for years.

jimcode3 wrote: I wonder though (aside from all other comments): which is the better path: (gadd.

It depends is the universal answer.

I just try my best to do what I do

When people start insulting me I normally just nod my head and go 'ok' then ignore them... not worth my time, I would rather be doing something else in all honesty...

In the same way if someone has wronged you in the past then I would try to adivse that you do your best to come to terms with it... Ok. They screwed you over (as an example) how are you going to prevent that happening again? You aren't going to be around them any more but there are so many other numerous things you could be doing with your life instead of concentrating on this bad experience

Learn from it... do your best to prevent it in future... then focus on other matters that are more pressing. Try not to live in the past...

Without further detail from yourself that is the basis of what I would advise

We are all here for you

there are things, that you never NEVER, can GET OVER IT
but with time, you can learn to live with it, and had not much damage...

I don't know what are you talking about.... can be a friend family dead, or divorce, or friend, or ... you know.

for every case, there's something in your mind, you can use it to get better about it...

maybe with more info, we can help you better, if you don't like to talk in here, you can contact me, or any other member by PM.

just look forward....