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Problems with others
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07 Feb 2013 10:25 #93530
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Let me start off my response to this with one of my favorite quotes.
"If they mind, they do not matter, if they matter, they do not mind."
Your family don't understand it, to refrence another member here, your family will think it is just a "phase", when I told my family about it, my father laughed and started to make jokes about it, my mother just laughed and carried on doing her usual thing.
Thing is they might not support MY choice but it is still MY choice, you see if I say to someone "I'm going to go to the gym" 100 times...it is nothing but words, but if I go to the gym 100 times and say nothing, they will notice a change. We are social creatures by nature, we talk about things we notice, if 6 months down the line your parents notice you have changed just mention to them about Jediism, they will take it more seriously, my mother for instance has taken it more seriously because of the way it has changed me.
So don't worry about them laughing at you, yes it might be hard because although we don't have force powers, we do need to develop thick skin & the ability to handle awkward questions.
I also understand you're proud to call yourself a Jedi and want to go around telling anyone that will listen, but this often comes with a disheartening effect, when asked about my religion (which has only happened twice) I have said "I am a Jedi, I don't role play, I follow the legitimate religion of love and peace, it speaks to me more than other religions." I have changed a drastic amount over the last few months, my body is more relaxed, I'm healthier, I'm happier.
And when someone asks me how I have changed so much, I blame TOTJO.
Beside every great man there is a great woman.
Replied by on topic Re: Problems with others
Malcolm Serenity wrote: Coyote: My family makes fun of me for it. They think it's a waste of time an I'm not going to learn anything. That's not true. I think I'll learn something here that will help me with life. I'm learning how to focus, how to know myself, and how to look for the old in the world.
Let me start off my response to this with one of my favorite quotes.
"If they mind, they do not matter, if they matter, they do not mind."
Your family don't understand it, to refrence another member here, your family will think it is just a "phase", when I told my family about it, my father laughed and started to make jokes about it, my mother just laughed and carried on doing her usual thing.
Thing is they might not support MY choice but it is still MY choice, you see if I say to someone "I'm going to go to the gym" 100 times...it is nothing but words, but if I go to the gym 100 times and say nothing, they will notice a change. We are social creatures by nature, we talk about things we notice, if 6 months down the line your parents notice you have changed just mention to them about Jediism, they will take it more seriously, my mother for instance has taken it more seriously because of the way it has changed me.
So don't worry about them laughing at you, yes it might be hard because although we don't have force powers, we do need to develop thick skin & the ability to handle awkward questions.
I also understand you're proud to call yourself a Jedi and want to go around telling anyone that will listen, but this often comes with a disheartening effect, when asked about my religion (which has only happened twice) I have said "I am a Jedi, I don't role play, I follow the legitimate religion of love and peace, it speaks to me more than other religions." I have changed a drastic amount over the last few months, my body is more relaxed, I'm healthier, I'm happier.
And when someone asks me how I have changed so much, I blame TOTJO.
Malcolm Serenity wrote: My girlfriend is the only person who supports me. She's proud that I'm voluntarily Doug something to help myself both now and in the future.
Beside every great man there is a great woman.
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07 Feb 2013 20:01 - 07 Feb 2013 20:04 #93628
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Replied by on topic Re: Problems with others
Malcom Serenity,
One of the things people react to is: "difference." It has been said that people will react to difference in two (consecutive) ways: fear what they don't understand, then kill what they fear. It's also true of things of which someone only has the "partial story" but yet still fear.
At least, that's from our hunter / gatherer history. Sabretooth tiger, anyone?
There's another way to see it, the veritable "flip side of the coin" sequence.
Bear with me and read all of this: I took the time to type it, you take the time to read it. Trust me: I'm making an important (but sometimes hard-to-believe) point.
It will seem far-fetched and unlikely at first, but, follow it to the end and you will see my point (which is just my opinion; don't hate me for taking this tact).
Click on the SPOILER text to read it all.
Pretend you're a Catholic. [I only use this example because I was Catholic years ago.] Now, pretend you're describing your religion to a ***relative*** who has no connection to Christianity in any way, shape, or form. The person hasn't even seen the "Charlie Brown Christmas" special before!
Here's our "weekly ritual:"
These are the coloured ( for my British friends : ) glasses you have to see through when considering what people think when someone's faith is being explained to them. Combine that with everyone's automatic curiosity: "Cult or not?" You can see how such a personal issue (for you and me) might be less-than-respected-or-understood by another person.
Mind you, this completely IGNORES the fact that "Jediism" is irrevocably linked to Star Wars; people will automatically think you are that kid Weird Al Yankovic describes as still "living in your parents basement, downloading pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar."
If you're smart (or looking to avoid an argument or ridicule), you'll explain FIRST that you're faith follows a combination, eastern-based religion that combines elements of Taoism, Buddhism, and others. [Then you just sound "odd" instead of a "space case."] If they press on, then give it to her / him.
Thankfully, my wife is Buddhist, so it only took two sentences to explain.
I got lucky.
One of the things people react to is: "difference." It has been said that people will react to difference in two (consecutive) ways: fear what they don't understand, then kill what they fear. It's also true of things of which someone only has the "partial story" but yet still fear.
At least, that's from our hunter / gatherer history. Sabretooth tiger, anyone?
There's another way to see it, the veritable "flip side of the coin" sequence.
Bear with me and read all of this: I took the time to type it, you take the time to read it. Trust me: I'm making an important (but sometimes hard-to-believe) point.
It will seem far-fetched and unlikely at first, but, follow it to the end and you will see my point (which is just my opinion; don't hate me for taking this tact).
Click on the SPOILER text to read it all.
Pretend you're a Catholic. [I only use this example because I was Catholic years ago.] Now, pretend you're describing your religion to a ***relative*** who has no connection to Christianity in any way, shape, or form. The person hasn't even seen the "Charlie Brown Christmas" special before!
Here's our "weekly ritual:"
Warning: Spoiler!
These are the coloured ( for my British friends : ) glasses you have to see through when considering what people think when someone's faith is being explained to them. Combine that with everyone's automatic curiosity: "Cult or not?" You can see how such a personal issue (for you and me) might be less-than-respected-or-understood by another person.
Mind you, this completely IGNORES the fact that "Jediism" is irrevocably linked to Star Wars; people will automatically think you are that kid Weird Al Yankovic describes as still "living in your parents basement, downloading pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar."
If you're smart (or looking to avoid an argument or ridicule), you'll explain FIRST that you're faith follows a combination, eastern-based religion that combines elements of Taoism, Buddhism, and others. [Then you just sound "odd" instead of a "space case."] If they press on, then give it to her / him.
Thankfully, my wife is Buddhist, so it only took two sentences to explain.
I got lucky.
Last edit: 07 Feb 2013 20:04 by .
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