Perspective and Reaction

Leah Starspectre wrote: Moments later. I felt silly and ashamed of myself. Not because I'd interrupted the meeting with my panic, but because I'd been unfair to that spider, and that it was dead. I'd let my reaction propel my behaviour.

I don't think the spider minded that you fled, to be honest. It probably minded being killed, but that wasn't your reaction that killed it. That was another person's reaction. One who has a "kill all spiders in my space" policy, most likely.

I don't thinking fleeing a potential threat (with all possible haste) is an unreasonable reaction. Spiders can be deadly. Most aren't, but I for one am not familiar enough to spider species to play around. If I spider is suddenly in my space then I'm going to be suddenly out of that space. Then I'll let the spider be (or put it somewhere out of the way if I can see it's obviously not a danger to me). Fleeing spiders isn't really unfair to the spider.

Everything is a matter of perception. The only way you can experience the world is by perceiving it. Some perceptions need to be modified, but there's no other way to react to things than based on how you perceive them.

Parnerium wrote: Everything is a matter of perception. The only way you can experience the world is by perceiving it. Some perceptions need to be modified, but there's no other way to react to things than based on how you perceive them.

can you talk more about that? what do you mean "modified"?

how do we modify our perceptions?
and how do we know which perceptions need to be modified?

Briefly, for the sake of Spiders -

They're not bad!

They're mostly harmless, they kill smaller, more irritating bugs - and even if you do get bitten (Most species won't bother) you are unlikely to die (unless you are a child, or elderly, or probably dying soon anyway)

Fun List! https://www.planetdeadly.com/animals/australias-dangerous-spiders

I've encountered all of these fellows, and survived bites from three!

(In truth, I routinely do battle with, and probably kill No. 10. Sanctity of Life is one thing, but if you're going to insist on putting your web at face height on the garden path from my back door to the clothesline, at some point we're going to come to a fairly significant disagreement)


Nothing more to add to the OP - Just Spiders are your friends!



If you want a Bug to make enemies with - Pick Centipedes. Those guys are gits.

JamesSand wrote: In truth, I routinely do battle with, and probably kill No. 10. Sanctity of Life is one thing, but if you're going to insist on putting your web at face height on the garden path from my back door to the clothesline, at some point we're going to come to a fairly significant disagreement

Reason why Australian's walk around so slowly, one eye down for snakes and the other up for large face hugging spiders!?

I think they ball up and drop don't they? They probably think we are trying to eat them!! It would be a great test of reaction if it actually did end up on your face!!!!!!

Had a huntsmen a few years ago on the ceiling and it was over 30cm in diameter, staring, watching, waiting....
I think it was the one who lived in my letterbox, which at night I'd throw rocks at to scare it off so I could open the gate to drive through. I swear one night it threw a rock back at me
:lol:
When they can fight back it starts to become fair!!!!

OB1Shinobi wrote:
can you talk more about that? what do you mean "modified"?

how do we modify our perceptions?
and how do we know which perceptions need to be modified?

If you think that a bite from a daddy long legs will kill you in three seconds, you're wrong. So you need to go modify your perception of those spiders as being a certain death sentence by picking up a book.

Some perceptions are just unhelpful. I know someone who perceived Wal-Mart stores as being too large to effectively shop in. I introduced her to a way of shopping that involved going in and getting what you need instead of meandering around random aisles sightseeing and chatting with random strangers. That helped to change her perception of Wal-Mart being too big.

Perceptions that aren't accurate or are unhelpful to you should be modified to improve your quality of life.

@Parnerium
so one way to modify perceptions is to acquire new information, ok, cool

i think in many cases that could modify the perception automatically

but what if i already know that such and such spider isnt going to kill me and i still freak out? is there another way i modify this perception?

and also i think a case can be made that for general purposes, fear of spiders might actually be useful, because some of them are pretty dangerous

so how do we decide which perceptions are useful and which are not?

is there some criteria i can apply to all my perceptions an say "this proves its useful" or "this means it is not useful"?

this isnt like a quizz or anything lol and im not anyone "important"

your comment brought up an interesting and i would think very useful line of thought, if its one that could be developed into something

and i appreciate that you didnt just declare something is true or imply something is true or might be true and then retract yourself from the discussion

OB1Shinobi wrote: but what if i already know that such and such spider isnt going to kill me and i still freak out? is there another way i modify this perception?

That's hard. There are plenty of bugs I know are harmless but when I see them I'm still running away screaming. Lots of that can be fixed with exposure, I think. Be forced to touch enough harmless spiders and eventually you'll stop acting like they're harmful. Sometimes just repeatedly confronting the thought is enough to slowly start changing it so it's no longer your natural reaction.

OB1Shinobi wrote: and also i think a case can be made that for general purposes, fear of spiders might actually be useful, because some of them are pretty dangerous

so how do we decide which perceptions are useful and which are not?

is there some criteria i can apply to all my perceptions an say "this proves its useful" or "this means it is not useful"?

Yeah, that's the thing. If your fear of spiders means you aren't getting bitten by anything, then it's probably a useful fear. But if it means you aren't getting bitten by anything and you're too afraid to go camping even though you really want to go, that's not so useful. Now it's holding you back from living life in the way you want to live it.

I think perceptions that are making your life (and maybe other people's lives) worse need to be changed. To that end, I would even say a perception that is factually inaccurate but still beneficial to you would be a fine perception to keep around. Ignorance is bliss or something like that.

OB1Shinobi wrote: and i appreciate that you didnt just declare something is true or imply something is true or might be true and then retract yourself from the discussion

OB1Shinobi, you're wrong about everything you've ever said! *never replies to you again*

Inherent value in all life + curiosity to its intentions, divided by your ability to backpeddle without going head over heels :blink: