OBSESSION DESTROYS

Feel free to substitute speaking and writing for thinking. Be well. Be happy. Peace

The more I think about things the less effective my thinking is. I think harder and I get stressed. Then I get obsessive and my thinking does nothing except make things worse and worse. It is no longer about right or wrong. It's a wicked wicked spiral into more frustration and wasted energy. If I'm lucky I can back away, let it go and break the cycle, if not it consumes me. I'm taking a break. Peace

If you were to ask me about what you had posted I would tell you…

There should be a distinction between thinking about things and becoming obsessed with them. I recognize that you realize this and would offer a not so simple solution to the issue. Learn to let go. That sounds easy, but when something has begun to occupy one’s mind to the point of obsessing it is actually much more difficult.

So, how is “letting go” accomplished? I would say that for each person it is different. For me, it was a realization and a choice. For some I know, it is an emotional climax that seems a need to be reached before it is possible. Whatever process you require to accomplish this, I would suggest seeking it out.

And of course, you wouldn’t have to take this journey on you own… there are those of us here to assist; and, my PM box is always open.



[hr]

I opted for writing over thinking.

Cabur Senaar wrote: Below is the contents of a document I ran into years ago. I lost the only hard copy I had, but recently recovered one. Very pleased! The document is part of the sober support literature. AA and the sort. In my professional life, I have worked with a number of addicts, so being conversant in the literature is helpful.

Non-attachment is a challenging topic, I think.

I regard it as useful food for thought, though some I prefer to others. I have included the list in its entirety, save for grammatical corrections. I do not regard the list as necessarily definitive, but certainly a clarifying piece. I hope you find it useful. I invite useful comment.

Letting Go

• To let go doesn't mean to stop caring. It means I can’t do it for someone else.
• To let go is not to cut myself off. It’s the realization that I can’t control another.
• To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.
• To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
• To let go is not to try to change or blame another. I can only change myself.
• To let go is not to care for, but to care about.
• To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.
• To let go is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
• To let go is not to be in the middle, arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own outcomes.
• To let go is not to be protective. It is to permit another to face reality.
• To let go is not to deny, but to accept.
• To let go is not to nag, scold, or argue, but to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
• To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes, and to cherish the moment.
• To let go is not to criticize or regulate anyone, but to try to become whatever I dream I can be.
• To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
• To let go is to fear less and love more.

I get it man. It took me a long time to be able to figure out that my over-thinking of things was causing mental and emotional issues for me. Now that you know that it is causing issues, it is a lot easier to identify when it is happening and thus shut it down. Simply by recognizing when it was happening allowed me to snap out and back off. At the same time, my over analytical side also served as a mask for other issues.

So, basically I would use the problem to your advantage to find exactly what is going on. Through self knowledge, gained by channeling the over thinking tendencies you described, I was able to solve my similar problems.

Overthinking is a problem.

Underthinking is a problem.

Balance is (always) preferable to scarcity or excess.

When I first started this path I saw differently. My mind was blown on the things I saw. I feel ya on the overload in the cerebral area!
Now, there is a point I have come to where things are no longer as overwhelming and as "big" as they seem. Since we are here in this Forum I will encourage you to find good people and good things. Do not feel like you are alone. Eventually thru "training" you can control that feeling, Even position or change it if you so choose.
Obsession is something that can be a gift if you so choose or a deep dark thing. (our choice) The obsession I have with the fire of learning has yet to be quenched. The obsession with my family is self explanatory but I have chose to make it a healthy kind of thing. It has taken a lot, ALOT of time but is possible. There are many ways to take and control any feelings, we do it on a daily basis any ways, might as well benefit from it.
Breaks are good

I'm glad I checked in. I appreciate your concerns, I am fine, but this was meant for a discussion about recent obsessive threads that went too long (IMHO) and the destructive/negative nature of them for the OP, posters and the forum. I don't think an outsider looking in on this type of stuff would have a very positive impression about this place.

Though I spoke from a personal point of view I thought, "Feel free to substitute speaking and writing for thinking" would stimulate others to think about this and responses with their thoughts.

Having said that lets have another go at this. Please speak up and post you thoughts.

Obsessing on something or overthinking is usually a symptom of feeling powerless in the search for a solution. The problem is daunting and your mind is running in circles looking for an answer that will ultimately remain illusive.

In my experience, it helps to choose one simple thing that I CAN do and start there. The first step to solving world hunger is to feed yourself, then your neighbor. By completing small tasks and achieving small victories, the big stuff doesn't seem so big anymore.

And never forget that others are willing to do the thinking with you. You need not take the entire burden on yourself.

Senan wrote: Obsessing on something or overthinking is usually a symptom of feeling powerless in the search for a solution. The problem is daunting and your mind is running in circles looking for an answer that will ultimately remain illusive.

In my experience, it helps to choose one simple thing that I CAN do and start there. The first step to solving world hunger is to feed yourself, then your neighbor. By completing small tasks and achieving small victories, the big stuff doesn't seem so big anymore.

And never forget that others are willing to do the thinking with you. You need not take the entire burden on yourself.

Obsession is always seen bad. Is there a good version of obsession? It always gets a bad rap lol.

carlos.martinez3 wrote:

Senan wrote: Obsessing on something or overthinking is usually a symptom of feeling powerless in the search for a solution. The problem is daunting and your mind is running in circles looking for an answer that will ultimately remain illusive.

In my experience, it helps to choose one simple thing that I CAN do and start there. The first step to solving world hunger is to feed yourself, then your neighbor. By completing small tasks and achieving small victories, the big stuff doesn't seem so big anymore.

And never forget that others are willing to do the thinking with you. You need not take the entire burden on yourself.

Obsession is always seen bad. Is there a good version of obsession? It always gets a bad rap lol.

As tzb says above, I think any obsession means that one is out of balance. You should never completely obsess about anything as it probably means you are neglecting some other aspect of your life. I think this is in part what Rickie is getting at with this thread. Some recent conversations here have gone on much longer than probably necessary out of what seems to be a need to obsess over a few small grievances rather than focusing on the big picture of being a better Jedi and better human being each day.

That being said, to wholly concentrate all of one's efforts on a noble cause, such as finding a cure for a disease, could certainly be seen as a healthy "obsession" assuming that it doesn't drive one completely mad in the process. I believe we Jedi would call that "focus" rather than "obsession".