we all have moments where we act without really knowing what our intentions are
often we would explain ourselves a certain way if we were called on to do so, and we would mostly believe our own explanations, but anyone who knows us, or who recognizes whats going on from their own experience, can see that the explanation we use is not at all self aware and does not really get to the heart of the matter
i have learned for myself that if i am going to put myself in the position of holding OTHER PEOPLE responsible, then i had better be very sincere about understanding their intentions - their frame of reference, before passing my verdict
sometimes the situation is an obvious case, but sometimes - many times, it is not
but it would appear to be an obvious case if i were not interested in seeing beyond my own quick judgements
and i dont think its possible for any of us to get through life without making some pretty big mistakes, which unfortunately, are going to hurt other people
by looking deeply and honestly into the frame of reference, we are able to at least sometimes distinguish between those moments when someone causes hurt because they were in the midst of their own selfish mania, and those moments when someone made what they really thought to be the best course of action for all involved but were wrong, or were not up to the task, or whatever
People are complicated.
