What is family to you?

Jax Styder wrote: In the military I've formed stronger family bonds with the men i served with then people i grew up with that share the same blood line. The experiences and trials we face together make us family it makes us care for one anothers well being. Mutual respect for one another and building a level of trust creates a bond that you will have for eachother years after you've never seen eachother. Semper Fi (Always Faithful)

A truer statement could never be made brother. I've lived next to, fought next to, and would die next to any one of the men I serve with. A better family I could not ask for.

"The blood of the oath is thicker than the water of the womb", I don't feel particular bonds to most of my blood, but I have friends that I would consider siblings in a sense. I suppose I'd say it's those that regardless of how long you've been apart, you still have a good time when you are together again.

Blood makes us related, loyalty makes us family

I call basically all of my close friends family, and in a way, this temple is a family
Just because we are of the same blood i do not see all my relatives as "real" family

To put it short i see all those that i can trust, that i feel like i belong with, as my family. Even if we are not related to eachother, because sometimes friends can be more loyal then relatives. However i do also see those that i live with, and some of my closer relatives as family.

This seems like a simple question... but in fact I can't really give a definition that I'm satisfied with...

Proteus' answer was a good one (not just saying that cos I'm in the picture )...

My family are the people of my blood foremost..
They are the friends of mine who'll share all the good and bad times
There are people on TOTJO that I would call my family too

What's that phrase... "Friends are the family you choose"

Family is time plus bond there could be moment where family turns into friendship. There are the certain hormones released through the brains of parents it is also released in people who are in love. I guess this could be a chemical explanation for the feeling of familiar bonds. I think the chemical is oxytocin.

Time+bond+ experience=family
The time can be a short period of time of long, but it all falls down to the bond and the experience.
Ex.
Two army men knows each other for only 7 months but build a bond threw what they experience in that short peri od of time

Open discussion

"Familiarity breeds contempt" - As they say


I have my family (blood relatives, or whatever) some of which I am quite fond of, the others...well I'm not NOT fond of them, but when you see someone once every decade or so it's hard to be particularly invested in them.

Most of my friends have a nasty habit of dying, or at least engaging in enough self destruction to make sustaining the bond...untenable.

Still, there are one or two individuals for whom I would sacrifice as much as I would for my brother.*

Does that make them family? Not really in my book, my brother is family - but they are dear friends.

I see no reason to mix the two words unnecessarily.


*It's an interesting sort of issue though - I've known my brother longer than anyone else, and unless he dies significantly earlier than me, I will likely know him longer than anyone else - but that doesn't mean we (ever) agree on anything, or necessarily always act in each other's best interests, we don't even like spending that much time together - but whatever else may go down, there'll always be a meal and a bed in each other's houses if required.


As for Proteus - Are the two chaps on the right (as you look it) of the picture related, or just happen to enjoy the same hairlines?

I have someone who I call a sister whom I've known since she was born (she is 25 now).
On the flip side I have had about half my blood family disown me (that is just what happens when you are transgender in a conservative family).

Family is anyone you 'feel' is family... someone you look up to and resonate with. Blood family really doesn't mean anything. I mean adopted kids who never know their blood family don't really have any bond with them. But their adopted family and friends tend to develop family strength bonds.

I consider anyone who I can trust with my life my family. loyalty, love, compassion, If a friend can show me all those, they are family.

Online Etymology Dictionary wrote: Family (n)
Early 15c., "servants of a household," from Latin familia "family servants, domestics collectively, the servants in a household," thus also "members of a household, the estate, property; the household, including relatives and servants," abstract noun formed from famulus "servant, slave," which is of unknown origin.

The Latin word rarely appears in the sense "parents with their children," for which domus (see domestic (adj.)) was used. Derivatives of famulus include famula "serving woman, maid," famulanter "in the manner of a servant," famulitas "servitude," familiaris "of one's household, private," familiaricus "of household slaves," familiaritas "close friendship."

I find it interesting that etymologically, there is a relationship between the word "family" and "servant", mostly because it's true. Your family is the people who you've chosen to serve, those for whom you are capable of great sacrifice. It's fair to assume that we would all consider our children family, since we've taken care for them since they were born, and would slave away at work for, just to make sure they are alright. The same goes for our caregivers, usually parents or other relatives.

But as others have said here, sometimes blood relatives are not the kind that we can continue to serve, for one reason or another. But we can find these people outside of blood relatives, and usually these are people who we share with and trust, and who in turn share with us and trust. And thus the bond is formed. And service to them comes naturally, because we care for them as if they were us.

Thus, I can say that I have quite a few good friends outside of my blood relatives, who I consider family and for whom my door (or inbox) is always open.