Profiles - Gender

I went to update my own profile today and noticed that there are only two options for gender.
Given some of the discussions that have happened at totjo in the past, and the variety of people here, I wondered if perhaps we could be more inclusive and have some other options, even if it just 'other - please ask.'

Yeah, or maybe open it up to a write in so people can put whatever they want.

My experience of such people at totjo is that they absolutely need to be one or the other -- can't remain as neither even if that's how they were born. there are 3 options though, the third one being non-disclosure.

ren wrote: My experience of such people at totjo is that they absolutely need to be one or the other -- can't remain as neither even if that's how they were born. there are 3 options though, the third one being non-disclosure.

In the spirit of not making assumptions about people, non disclosure isn't very helpful.

Edan wrote:

ren wrote: My experience of such people at totjo is that they absolutely need to be one or the other -- can't remain as neither even if that's how they were born. there are 3 options though, the third one being non-disclosure.

In the spirit of not making assumptions about people, non disclosure isn't very helpful.

even if it just 'other - please ask.'

You sure change your mind quick don't you?!

ren wrote:

Edan wrote:

ren wrote: My experience of such people at totjo is that they absolutely need to be one or the other -- can't remain as neither even if that's how they were born. there are 3 options though, the third one being non-disclosure.

In the spirit of not making assumptions about people, non disclosure isn't very helpful.

even if it just 'other - please ask.'

You sure change your mind quick don't you?!

I'm sorry? 'other' isn't non disclosure... It's a disclosure that it's not straight forward male or female.

You dont have to put anything. I have never filled in profile.
But I dont see a problem with non disclosure.
People will assume of names or profile pictures anyway. I dont see how it matters.
And as it stands they can change there profile should they wish to be know by another gender.

Does anyone even read the profile of others?
(just wondering because I never have)

The probability of me doing any work to differentiate between "I haven't selected anything as gender therefore you'll have to ask" and "I identify as something funky which isn't available therefore you'll have to ask" is a guaranteed zero.

Besides, I don't see why we'd ask people if they have gender dysphoria when we don't ask about other mental illnesses, especially as the vast majority of the membership is incapable of identifying or accommodating simple common personality quirks / mental illnesses.

I assume this is a relatively easy technical fix for the site admins?


I don't have a preference as to how it's laid out, but a lot of "official" forms use

M/F/X

If Non-selection is already an option, then I don't see the issue.

There's free text areas in your profile? I suppose you can add whatever commentary about yourself you like there.

elizabeth wrote: Does anyone even read the profile of others?
(just wondering because I never have)

I often do, especially when greeting new members in chat. It helps me to get a feel for who they are, connect with them better, and get them oriented. It's certainly not necessary, but I find it's a useful tool for me.

Ah maybe gender is the wrong word . if we use the word "sex" you can only be one or the other , or , not want anybody to know what you are , you dont have to fill it in....

MartaLina wrote: Ah maybe gender is the wrong word . if we use the word "sex" you can only be one or the other , or , not want anybody to know what you are , you dont have to fill it in....

Indeed. My greatest regret when rewriting the doctrine was to use the word "gender" (pseudo-political nonsense) instead of "sex" (a fact of lfe)



Looking deeper into it it looks as though it can be done without breaking the forum with minimal effort, so as long as it works out this way, it's a non-issue for me.

ren wrote:

MartaLina wrote: Ah maybe gender is the wrong word . if we use the word "sex" you can only be one or the other , or , not want anybody to know what you are , you dont have to fill it in....

Indeed. My greatest regret when rewriting the doctrine was to use the word "gender" (pseudo-political nonsense) instead of "sex" (a fact of lfe)



Looking deeper into it it looks as though it can be done without breaking the forum with minimal effort, so as long as it works out this way, it's a non-issue for me.

Ah you are going to change the word gender into sex ? Because i can be quite the butch he woman and my current answer to my gender does not express that now

MartaLina wrote:

ren wrote:

MartaLina wrote: Ah maybe gender is the wrong word . if we use the word "sex" you can only be one or the other , or , not want anybody to know what you are , you dont have to fill it in....

Indeed. My greatest regret when rewriting the doctrine was to use the word "gender" (pseudo-political nonsense) instead of "sex" (a fact of lfe)



Looking deeper into it it looks as though it can be done without breaking the forum with minimal effort, so as long as it works out this way, it's a non-issue for me.

Ah you are going to change the word gender into sex ? Because i can be quite the butch he woman and my current answer to my gender does not express that now

Yes I have
It's sex, and we have female, male and "neither". We've had at least one "neither" before, and as unlikely as we are to meet hermaphrodites/intersex/you-name-it, it's only fair. They should have it on passports too imo.

ren wrote:

MartaLina wrote:

ren wrote:

MartaLina wrote: Ah maybe gender is the wrong word . if we use the word "sex" you can only be one or the other , or , not want anybody to know what you are , you dont have to fill it in....

Indeed. My greatest regret when rewriting the doctrine was to use the word "gender" (pseudo-political nonsense) instead of "sex" (a fact of lfe)



Looking deeper into it it looks as though it can be done without breaking the forum with minimal effort, so as long as it works out this way, it's a non-issue for me.

Ah you are going to change the word gender into sex ? Because i can be quite the butch he woman and my current answer to my gender does not express that now

Yes I have
It's sex, and we have female, male and "neither". We've had at least one "neither" before, and as unlikely as we are to meet hermaphrodites/intersex/you-name-it, it's only fair. They should have it on passports too imo.

Excellent , Edan is right , gender is a confusing word with different meanings to people , the word sex says exactly what you are or not if you are neither ...

Or... you know.. could just leave it as "gender" and change it to a fill in box and let people put what they feel applies best to them? That's just a simple matter of changing the entry type and pretty easily done on just about any forum profile set up...

Because frankly gender and sex are completely different things and gender has a greater day to day role in how people interact with one another compared to sex.

But whatever -_-

MartaLina wrote:

ren wrote:

MartaLina wrote:

ren wrote:

MartaLina wrote: Ah maybe gender is the wrong word . if we use the word "sex" you can only be one or the other , or , not want anybody to know what you are , you dont have to fill it in....

Indeed. My greatest regret when rewriting the doctrine was to use the word "gender" (pseudo-political nonsense) instead of "sex" (a fact of lfe)



Looking deeper into it it looks as though it can be done without breaking the forum with minimal effort, so as long as it works out this way, it's a non-issue for me.

Ah you are going to change the word gender into sex ? Because i can be quite the butch he woman and my current answer to my gender does not express that now

Yes I have
It's sex, and we have female, male and "neither". We've had at least one "neither" before, and as unlikely as we are to meet hermaphrodites/intersex/you-name-it, it's only fair. They should have it on passports too imo.

Excellent , Edan is right , gender is a confusing word with different meanings to people , the word sex says exactly what you are or not if you are neither ...

The gender thing is completely out of control, to a point where it feels like the embodiment of nonacceptance and self-hatred. That intersex member we had had a go at me after I suggested that they were perfectly fine as is and should not feel pressured to be one or the other.
To me it's just like "race". It staggered me when I moved to the UK that obviously mixed-race people so strongly identified as white or black. Now that I have a mixed-race family, this "identity" extremism worries me.

Avalonslight wrote: Or... you know.. could just leave it as "gender" and change it to a fill in box and let people put what they feel applies best to them? That's just a simple matter of changing the entry type and pretty easily done on just about any forum profile set up...

Because frankly gender and sex are completely different things and gender has a greater day to day role in how people interact with one another compared to sex.

But whatever -_-

I see what you mean , but there is an "about me" section too , where you can put all kinds of information you want to share about yourself

Avalonslight wrote: Or... you know.. could just leave it as "gender" and change it to a fill in box and let people put what they feel applies best to them? That's just a simple matter of changing the entry type and pretty easily done on just about any forum profile set up...

Because frankly gender and sex are completely different things and gender has a greater day to day role in how people interact with one another compared to sex.

But whatever -_-

Does it and should it though?

Can I get a 'dictionary check' please so I know we're all on the same page hahaa

Sex: physical pluming
Gender: the emotional/mental identity to society roles of male/female?