Love is Not Enough

Alain de Botton strikes again ! :pinch:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuKV2DI9-Jg

We'll have to now go clobber him so he'll learn to stop making sense ... :whistle:

Alexandre Orion wrote: Alain de Botton strikes again ! :pinch:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuKV2DI9-Jg

We'll have to now go clobber him so he'll learn to stop making sense ... :whistle:

Hehe, good one thanks!

I use to be a hopeless romantic. Followed my heart into every relationship. They all ended badly despite my best efforts. Some quicker than others but all hurtful in some way.

At my Grandparents golden wedding anniversary I started chatting to all the oldies about what makes a marriage work. They all said the same things and it had nothing to do with that little feeling you get when you meet someone. That feeling I use to think was love.

It took a couple of years to sink in but the seed was sown and when I started looking around I saw what they had told me was true. Then I did something rather crazy. I ignored my instinctive feelings and all those romantic movies and got logical about the process. Ended up asking out my best friend of 8 years. Had zero feelings for her and I got to tell you it was really weird to start with but we have been together for 13 years now and very happily married for 7 of those.

For me love isn't that heart racing feeling when you meet someone new and exciting. I mean I never had that feeling for someone ugly, just the attractive girls. If that feeling was some special sole mate thing you'd think looks, body odour, poor hygiene and the like wouldn't matter right?

For me love is like a little seed that starts so small you may not even be able to see it. It grows a little bit every day as you water and nurture it together. It never stops growing and it get bigger and stronger everyday. It grows into something mighty and strong. So big and so unmovable by wind and weather because of its solid foundations. Foundations made of friendship, forgiveness, trust, truthfulness, morals, sacrifice and plain old hard work. This is the love those oldies told me about and they were right.

We have so many single friends who tell us how lucky we are and how they wish they had what we have but they never take that same advice. It seems movies and romantic ideals hold more sway. They never stop to think that their life is a result of their choices.

Christian Bobin écrit :