Can you have a relationship with someone and still be a jedi

No the Jedi never kidnapped people! they took orphans or gave their kids better lives and a good strong upbringing. besides there is no Extended universe anymore. Its legends now and not cannon like the Jedi are. so maybe there are legends of Jedi doing this but those are told by bad people that dont like them!

I think a true jedi should not have attachements but love all uniformly. there are lots of people that do this and get great power from it. preists here on this planet do this and they become the only ones to get rid of sin. I want true jedi power in this way.

Why do you think this? (Not the movie stuff)
What power do you think we have?

Fyxe wrote: I think a true jedi should not have attachements but love all uniformly. there are lots of people that do this and get great power from it.

Name one of these “lots of people”, and explain what power they have. Maybe we can get a better idea of what you mean.

Priests don’t count. They are as flawed as any of us, they do not love unconditionally, and they do not get rid of sin (God does that in the Christian traditions)

wait? i never said unconditionally and i not sure why you would think even if you did that it means you must be perfect??!! why would you be perfect?

I never said unconditional though, I said uniform like they love everyone the same but none specifically. and priests do count! why would they not count? the dont have relationships and the do absolve sin. you just go to a priest and confess and they will forgive you for god. This is a power they have that others dont.

Why don't we have both?


Or rather, you've just come around to your original question anyway - Can you love someone (or someones), and also love everything (or at least, something grander and less focussed on individuals), without a conflict?


If you're lucky, maybe.

Will there be conflict? Most likely.

Perhaps you see (whatever quality you're chasing) as...lets say "Being polite to everyone"

One day, you're out with someone you love, and someone confronts them....chance of conflict here - your identity requires you be polite to everyone, but your love requires that you stand your ground against your love's opponent...what to do what to do...

It's a minor example, you can have whatever example you like, perhaps you are sworn to law, but your mate steals a car - I really don't care about the endless possible hypotheticals


Priests (being as vague as I like here, as I'm not sure the term has been well defined for this conversation) are more or less sworn to Gods truth, which, depending on where you read about it, might include Love of all of God's creation, and perhaps in more practical terms, a level of pastoral care for a specific group of peopple - Priests as often as not, do have human love interests, and they have to find a way to balance those two worlds.

Ask any pastor's partner - I'm sure they hate the 2am phone calls when they are trying to sleep, but the person they love has sworn to serve others....


Now, some of them might not do that, some of them might feel better service to the almighty involves abstaining from everything, shunning the human condition, and wearing the silliest hats they can find.

I don't really care either way, it's up to you to determine what is the better path for yourself, and how you want to manage your time and existence in this world.

*broadly speaking* Jediism favours are more...pragmatic view of the world, and most (not all) of those who follow the path acknowledge you have to be a part of the world, and trying to "rise above it" and be some guru on a mountain top is unlikely to serve anyone well.

well ya that would not be the case because I would never be with anyone that could not already defend themselves. The Jedi are not chivalrous like that. Women are Jedi as well! And lots of people practice love in a general sense but not a specific sense to attain enlightenment. I just finished my first lesson and it even talks about it there. It is a sacrifice. So like I mentioned the priests but even some people that Star Wars is based on do this. So I dont see why Jedi here dont practice it? Jains shun relathionships to attain a higher state, Sifi orders do it, no relations was deemed a high rule by Buddha, and hindu munks have rules against it too. So if Im jedi, like a monk warrior, why do they not practice this like in Star Wars? If they dont I dont see them as real Jedi, thats what I mean.

well ya that would not be the case because I would never be with anyone that could not already defend themselves.

It was a random hypothetical, whether or not the specifics apply to your circumstances matters not the slightest amount.

So like I mentioned the priests but even some people that Star Wars is based on do this. So I dont see why Jedi here dont practice it? Jains shun relathionships to attain a higher state, Sifi orders do it, no relations was deemed a high rule by Buddha, and hindu munks have rules against it too. So if Im jedi, like a monk warrior, why do they not practice this like in Star Wars? If they dont I dont see them as real Jedi, thats what I mean.

If are convinced that you can not have compassion for everyone, and also serve base human desires and needs, it's not my, or anyone elses job to dissuade you.

As someone who is also learning, I would like to throw in some thoughts.

If we observe the effects of Jedi in relationships in the fiction, yes, many Jedi turn to the Dark Side as a result of something going sour while romantically involved, but just as many Jedi end up turning for entirely unrelated reasons. Others even leave the Order without turning and end up having a safe and healthy relationship. In Luke Skywalker's EU Academy, we see him married (with a son even if I recall?). So the answer to the question fiction wise, to me, is closer to "What do you consider a Jedi to be?". Do you think one needs to be part of the Order to still be a Jedi? Do you consider Luke's EU Academy to be an example of "true Jedi"?

I believe this is pertinent when considering our real world, because similar situations arise. Someone loses themselves to alcohol or other vices after losing a loved one, it's easy to draw a line between abuse of those vices and falling to the Dark Side in fiction. It feels good, but when used too much it becomes detrimental. The relationship itself didn't cause this fall, it's how one chooses to go about life after loss.

I believe this is a personal question that can only really be answered on each Jedi as an individual. Do you personally think you could handle a relationship as a Jedi? Could you stay a Jedi after potentially losing someone that important? In my military experience, I saw many people divorce because they were married to a non-military spouse who thought they knew what they were signing up for... until the soldier was gone for months at a time, and came back for a few weeks only to leave again. This can also happen when asking yourself this question, the answer seems truthful until it becomes the unfavorable experience.

So perhaps the core question at the root is this: is the person you found special enough to risk your way of life for?
Many people here seem to have this answer of it not mattering as much because we don't follow a code like the fictional Jedi, but I propose this: the people who say this have already had to ask themselves this question and understand that this is not a Jedi exclusive problem. Most people have to ask themselves this question for someone at some point.

The way I view it is the characters in the fiction are not Jedi, but the most heavily weighted within an allegory for what a real Jedi might/should/could be. They are not ideals to me, nor the messages and actions necessarily literal.

If they are not ideals then why do you try to be like them? Why do you take their name and call your place a temple and I see all kinds of light sabers around here so...Im confused? I was talking to another person and they told me so many differences I was wondering if there were any similarities between this place and Star Wars Jedi? I mean what is the deal with that?

I see the lack of relationship in my life as the space I need to gain higher consciousness and greater control of powers. I am practicing Jedi powers and I want to master them. If I want to do this I dont see much room for other things like kids or spouse or stuff like that. I want to be like the real Jedi I see in the movies. I thought this place was closer to that? :S

I think your whole (rhetorical) question is based on a massive misunderstanding of TotJO

I hate to break it to you, but I don't know anyone (including at TotJO) who can use the force to make lightning, seductively move other people's fruit, or lift their starship out of a swamp. At the same time, don't let me stop you from looking for that elsewhere.
If you do find that not having human interaction gives you super powers, I'd ask you tell me... but then you'd lose your powers, so I guess I'll have to be content

Your are one big butt arent ya. I'm sorry you think we have intergalactic space ships and lightening is dark side and as for fruit. I'm already almost doing that. Too bad your so limited. Please just leave me alone butt rex!

Being a Jedi means having a relationship with and to everyone, at all times. Some will be more intimate than others, and that's OK. Some may be romantic, and that's OK.

Real-world Jedi are human, and humans do things like this. What's important isn't a "you can do this" and "you can't do that" set of rules. It's a mindfulness, an attention to one's own life, own intent, and own motivation which matters.

Jedi "can" do almost anything if the intent is pure. So the question becomes: can you have a relationship with someone and still be a Jedi?

No I would think you cant be a Jedi and have a relationship though. Thats what I think Im saying. If you call yourself a Jedi after the Jedi in the movies but you have a relationship then you are not a Jedi like that. you are something else arent you? I dont get why call yourself a Jedi then? What makes you Jedi and not something else? I guess, I asked this to another, What is the same in this place as the Jedi in movies that you call yourself Jedi?

What’s a Jedi ? This is a classic and a question that will never die. As long as there are modern day Jeddist - this question will be alive and well. It’s part of our gain and loss - where’s the point where we say who’s who or is it more what I am rather than looking at other people shoulders and wondering what they got going on... is it like that or is it or can it be to some point where we accept or tolerate other people’s choices along with ours. So many choices.

I guess its choices...? But there must be something that ties you to them, right? like I hear people sayin that Jedi got so much wrong.. so why are you trying to be someone that got so much wrong?

"Jediism is the religion of those who regard their Jedi practice as a religious vocation. Jedi observe a metaphysical entity called the Force and often practice meditation. Jedi beliefs at this Temple are outlined by our Doctrine and developed through participation in our training programmes.

The Temple is welcoming and you do not need to be religious, or even a Jedi, to accept our Doctrine or participate in our training programmes or on our forum.

Temple of the Jedi Order (TotJO) is a legally recognized Jedi Church and ministry of Jediism. While our focus as an organization is on Jedi religious practice, our doors are open to everyone and participation with us does not require Jedi faith.

We are a group of individuals coming together in a community to promote goodwill, understanding, compassion and serenity. We pursue a spiritual and human awareness so we may serve the world.

Here are some things TotJO is not: we are not a role-playing site, we do not teach mystical powers or how to build lightsabers, we are not a dedicated Star Wars fan site, we are not affiliated with George Lucas or Disney and we are not for people who just want to wear a badge reading "I'm a Jedi".

There are many Jedi communities across the internet with a great variety of beliefs, customs and policies. As a community we will do our best to address your concerns and take on board your views, but no one community may offer you exactly what you are looking for. If you would feel more comfortable elsewhere maybe one of the other Jedi communities would correspond more to your needs."

Fyxe wrote: No I would think you cant be a Jedi and have a relationship though. Thats what I think Im saying. If you call yourself a Jedi after the Jedi in the movies but you have a relationship then you are not a Jedi like that. you are something else arent you? I dont get why call yourself a Jedi then? What makes you Jedi and not something else? I guess, I asked this to another, What is the same in this place as the Jedi in movies that you call yourself Jedi?

Well on evidence of this organisation and others like it, your opinion is not one people here share - but if it's key to what it means to you to be Jedi to be celibate, by all means, dismiss anyone in a relationship as "not a Jedi". It is in my definition of Jediism that it is inclusive, compassionate and open. There is room for both views

I guess the only point I'd make beyond complete acceptance of your view, for you, is that... real-world Jediism has to cope with all the stuff that isn't in Star Wars. By the narrow definition of Star Wars... we'd be midichlorian screening everyone before allowing them to access the site, and demanding proof of telekinetic powers :side:

Can you still be a Jedi if you poop? Cos they never show them doing that in Star Wars... :whistle:

Jedi believe “In the Force, and in the inherent worth of all life within it.”
Isn’t reproduction necessary for producing said life? How could we be opposed to the relationships which bring about reproduction in a healthy manner?

So if there Jedi here aren't like Jedi in the movies or do what the Jedi did in the movies what do you do and why do you call it Jedi?