bullied

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bullied 13 Mar 2010 03:48 #29230

:( I've being bullied. What should i do? Fight of not?

Re:bullied 13 Mar 2010 05:46 #29232

  • RyuJin
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if possible avoid fighting, inform either parents,or teachers. you can also try avoiding where the bullies hang out...the first option should always be not to fight as fighting is a result of a communication breakdown...you can also try having a laugh at yourself if they try insulting you as this will give them the impression that what they are doing doesn't bother you(even though it may)...think about this, most bullies are cowards and/or feel weak which is why they pick on people smaller then them, others do so because they are arrogant and think that no one can do anything to stop them.

the choice to fight or not is entirely up to you, but always remember that every decision has a consequence as does every action, and you must be prepared to face the consequences otherwise why make the decision or take the action...
I do not need a cloak of darkness, I am darkness and I am light. I am both because the universe is both.
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Re:bullied 13 Mar 2010 12:14 #29239

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RyuJin wrote:
if possible avoid fighting, inform either parents,or teachers. you can also try avoiding where the bullies hang out...the first option should always be not to fight as fighting is a result of a communication breakdown...you can also try having a laugh at yourself if they try insulting you as this will give them the impression that what they are doing doesn't bother you(even though it may)...think about this, most bullies are cowards and/or feel weak which is why they pick on people smaller then them, others do so because they are arrogant and think that no one can do anything to stop them.

the choice to fight or not is entirely up to you, but always remember that every decision has a consequence as does every action, and you must be prepared to face the consequences otherwise why make the decision or take the action...

Also, I might add.... Try talking to the bully one-on-one. Not surrounded by a group of others. I have actually used all of these and they do not all work for all situations. But, I have found that a one-on-one conversation actually works best. As does talking to a person you trust, and asking them to be a go-between.

And as Ryujin said, actual fighting is a last resort.

Good Luck...

-MTFBWU-
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Master: Master Jasper_Ward
Apprentices: Knight Learn_To_Know, Viskhard, DanWerts, Elizabeth, Edan

"If you think it is important to know about yourself only because I or someone else has told you it is important, then I am afraid all communication between us comes to an end. But if we agree that it is vital that we understand ourselves completely, then you and I have quite a different relationship, then we can explore together with a happy, careful and intelligent enquiry.

I do not demand your faith; I am not setting myself up as an authority. I have nothing to teach you - no new philosophy, no new system, no new path to reality; there is no path to reality any more than to truth. All authority of any kind, especially in the field of thought and understanding, is the most destructive, evil thing. Leaders destroy the followers and followers destroy the leaders. You have to be your own teacher and your own disciple. You have to question everything that man has accepted as valuable, as necessary."~Krishnamurti~


Re:bullied 22 May 2010 20:06 #30857

To add onto 'if possible avoid fighting' let me tell you something. I myself used to be bullied. I was short and fat and that made me a target. The second I fought back though it started a sequence... Not only did the original bully want to fight me, but so did all of his friends. It came to a point where I was fighting almost every day just to protect myself. one day they all tried to jump me at once, they succeeded.I went to the hospital because they, and the rest of there gang, tried to kill me. I still believe it could have all been avoided, but once I balled my fists that first time I had already written the end of that chapter in my life.

Humor is the best way (In my oppinion) to stave of a bullies attacks/insults/etc. But I have to agree that you should try to talk to your bully in a one-on-one situation.

I know I'm just an initiate, but if you want to talk to me more personally because I've been through it myself, please send me a private message.
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Re:bullied 23 May 2010 04:44 #30865

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quite true, like you i know from experience that sometimes when you do fight back it only brings on more fights.... my first 3 years of school i was beat up 2-3 times a day everyday. after learning martial arts, the first time i defended myself successfully all the other trouble makers decided they wanted to fight me too which led to a lot more fights. over time people began leaving me alone...
I do not need a cloak of darkness, I am darkness and I am light. I am both because the universe is both.
Warning: Spoiler! [ Click to expand ]

J.l.lawson, knight, b.div, o.c.p
Intake officer, Eastern Studies S.I.G advisor
Former masters: GM KanaSeikoHaruki, Br.John
Current apprentices: Kalkho, Raikoutenshi, Zenchi, Jacen Solo(on hiatus)

Re:bullied 29 May 2010 11:00 #30969

I had a completely different experience in my childhood. I was bullied constantly by an individual on my street. One day, I decided I'd had enough and I drilled him right in the mouth. We scuffled for a bit and went our separate ways. Never got bullied by him again. Not saying it will always end up like that, but for the most part, bullies are looking for easy targets so don't be an easy target.

Sometimes violence is a last resort, sometimes it's a good deterrent.

Re:bullied 29 May 2010 14:25 #30971

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welcome to totjo mindas,

very true most bullies do look for what they consider to be easy targets...and it's also true that violence should be a last resort but can sometimes be a good deterrent....there's an old saying:\"power perceived is power achieved\"....sometimes a display of firepower is enough to keep trouble at bay....look at the cold war....
I do not need a cloak of darkness, I am darkness and I am light. I am both because the universe is both.
Warning: Spoiler! [ Click to expand ]

J.l.lawson, knight, b.div, o.c.p
Intake officer, Eastern Studies S.I.G advisor
Former masters: GM KanaSeikoHaruki, Br.John
Current apprentices: Kalkho, Raikoutenshi, Zenchi, Jacen Solo(on hiatus)

Re:bullied 29 May 2010 18:28 #30979

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Another Quote:

\"Violence may not be the best option, but it is still an option.....\"

and

\"It is not how many times you get knocked down, but how many times you get back up.....\"

and per Bruce Wayne's dad,

\"Why do we fall? To learn to pick ourselves up\"
Rite: PureLand
Master: Master Jasper_Ward
Apprentices: Knight Learn_To_Know, Viskhard, DanWerts, Elizabeth, Edan

"If you think it is important to know about yourself only because I or someone else has told you it is important, then I am afraid all communication between us comes to an end. But if we agree that it is vital that we understand ourselves completely, then you and I have quite a different relationship, then we can explore together with a happy, careful and intelligent enquiry.

I do not demand your faith; I am not setting myself up as an authority. I have nothing to teach you - no new philosophy, no new system, no new path to reality; there is no path to reality any more than to truth. All authority of any kind, especially in the field of thought and understanding, is the most destructive, evil thing. Leaders destroy the followers and followers destroy the leaders. You have to be your own teacher and your own disciple. You have to question everything that man has accepted as valuable, as necessary."~Krishnamurti~


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Re:bullied 29 May 2010 18:54 #30981

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another would be: \" true strength is in getting back up one more time than you were knocked down\"
I do not need a cloak of darkness, I am darkness and I am light. I am both because the universe is both.
Warning: Spoiler! [ Click to expand ]

J.l.lawson, knight, b.div, o.c.p
Intake officer, Eastern Studies S.I.G advisor
Former masters: GM KanaSeikoHaruki, Br.John
Current apprentices: Kalkho, Raikoutenshi, Zenchi, Jacen Solo(on hiatus)

Re:bullied 29 May 2010 21:51 #30983

Some more would be:

\"Karate is about sente.\" - Choki Motobu (sente means striking first)
\"Walk softly and carry a big stick.\" - Teddy Roosevelt

And lastly, my favorite:
\"Those who say violence is a last resort haven't resorted to enough of it.\" - unknown

:laugh:
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