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My drug addiction

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20 Apr 2012 18:13 #56949 by
My drug addiction was created by
It seems it has gripped the very fabrics of my being. It whispers to me before bed, before I brush my teeth, while I'm in the shower, while I'm reading, while I'm writing, While I'm playing my guitar, while my band is on stage, while I am in the throes of work it calls to me and is the unstoppable force that ultimately drives me to my destruction.

I want to stop but I wonder if I even could. Without it I feel powerless.

The first time I took any form of opiates was when I first played a gig in a small town called Kimball. It was an underground music fest, and a lot of drugs were passed around after my show. Thing is the party literally didn't end till 5 in the morning and everything started up again around 11 am. It was a three day event full of booze, pot, and all sorts of different drugs.

I even started a relationship with a chick who was addicted to pain pills, her name is Jen and she really pushed me with the crap. She got me into taking hydrocodones, jellies, morphine, oxycodone and most recently Ecstasy.

While I'm on and off it I feel so irritable.

I'm on the path of trying to ween myself away from these opiates, as they are too controlling of my life. Without them I feel almost a sense of powerlessness but I think without them life will turn to a better direction.

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20 Apr 2012 18:52 #56950 by Jestor
Replied by Jestor on topic Re: My drug addiction
Let me quote what i put on facebook as a Temple post...

"Immediately the resolution to walk a higher path is made, temptation and trial begin. Men have found that no sooner have they decided to lead a truer and nobler life than they have been overwhelmed with such a torrent of new temptations and difficulties as make their position almost unendurable, and many men, because of this, relinquish their resolution."

~James Allen~


You and the strength you need, are in my thoughts...

On walk-about...

Sith ain't Evil...
Jedi ain't Saints....


"Bake or bake not. There is no fry" - Sean Ching


Rite: PureLand
Former Memeber of the TOTJO Council
Master: Jasper_Ward
Current Apprentices: Viskhard, DanWerts, Llama Su, Trisskar
Former Apprentices: Knight Learn_To_Know, Knight Edan, Knight Brenna, Knight Madhatter

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20 Apr 2012 19:09 #56951 by
Replied by on topic My drug addiction
You are in my thoughts. I sincerely hope you find the strength to conquer addiction. It's no easy road and I am sure you know that. Have you thought about seeking professional help? There is no shame in asking for help when one really needs it.

May the Force be with you.

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20 Apr 2012 19:14 #56954 by Wescli Wardest
Only you know the direction your life needs to go and only you can get it there. You are in my thoughts and prayers... and you have my support.

May you have courage in your journey, and...
May the Force be with you my friend.

Monastic Order of Knights

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20 Apr 2012 19:46 #56957 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
I've been down a similar-ish road before, myself. I wish I had advice or guidance to give to you that might be of some value, but I honestly don't. That's a rough place to be and is so unique to each person in it. What I can offer is an ear, as I'm sure everyone else will offer as well.

Master Jestors quote was spot on. It will be the hardest thing you will ever do in your life. I couldn't do it alone because of how difficult it actually was.

Everyone else said it, and I will too: My thoughts are with you.

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20 Apr 2012 21:24 #56975 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
Ty everyone for your advice and thanks Jestor for the quote. All of you helped me quite a lot just now, which is very strange for me to say. I want to stop because I need to. I do not like objects to have any control over me whatsoever and I feel that if I continue down this path it will lead me somewhere I don't want to be.

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20 Apr 2012 21:58 #56983 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
Your in a tough spot. Only by making new healthy habits will you be able to kick the old ones. Beat the cause not the effect. The only thing i can foresee is that you'll have to change so much of who you are in order to go back to who you were because only the person you were can make a positive change.

I wish you the best of luck. We call gotta die of something. Most of us wont get to choose how, when, or why but at least we can try to choose what NOT to die from.

May The Force Be With You.

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21 Apr 2012 00:00 - 21 Apr 2012 00:14 #57003 by Adder
Replied by Adder on topic Re: My drug addiction
Good luck Kawda Dopor, you might have to consider changing the circles you hang with which can be a bummer if you don't want to do that, but the best way to avoid temptation is to not have any - in my experience. Hope you find the strength you need.

Introverted extropian, mechatronic neurothealogizing, technogaian buddhist.
Likes integration, visualization, elucidation and transformation.
Jou ~ Deg ~ Vlo ~ Sem ~ Mod ~ Med ~ Dis
TM: Grand Master Mark Anjuu
Last edit: 21 Apr 2012 00:14 by Adder.
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21 Apr 2012 13:05 #57056 by Alethea Thompson
My most recent "academic" project has been writing a meditation journal for Force Academy (and will be publishing it). During the first six months I had to look up a variety of different meditative techniques. Mantras seem to be a good focusing technique to help overcome habits, though addictions may bemore difficult.

My suggestion is to try doing a mantra when you wake up and one before you go to bed. If you need to, throw in one around lunch. The mantrahas to be related to the addiction, and should not change. If you say "No more opiates", later you cannot say "Opiates are of the devil".

If you are religious you can make the mantra include your deity (if you happen to be pagan, you may look up a deity that helps overcome addiction). Just ensure your mantra is easy enough to remember, but it may be As long as...say...a "Hail Mary" prayer. And remember to not just recite the words, imagine your life WITHOUT those drugs, that is the life you want to align yourself with.

The idea behind this, is that you are trying to condition your mind for your future self (I imagine it, I begin to act like I am that imagination, I become my vision-as long as it is reasonable, I do not buy "The Secret", but do believe in basics of Psychology), as opposed to simply wanting to get rid of an addiction that is considered a problematic issue here and now.

Gather at the River,
Setanaoko Oceana

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21 Apr 2012 14:31 #57068 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
I appreciate your suggestion however the kinds of drugs i take took a toll on my system and without opiates my body goes through different stages of withdrawals when I don't take the pills. I'm currently going through the withdrawals. I do quite a lot of meditating at the moment and just trying to get my mind off the matter competently.

These withdrawals are extreme though, it's not just a matter of mind over and body. I just shut myself in my house and have no communication with the outside world while I am going through the different stages I'm currently going through.

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21 Apr 2012 14:43 #57070 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
I to am an addict. however, I've been in recovery for 14 years. If you are like me you can not quit on your own and my suggestion to you is go find your nearest Narcotics Anonymous Hall and get to work. They will teach you all you can possibly imagine about living a sober life. Through their suggestions you can overcome your problem. I can't speak for you and tell you you're an addict that's for you to decide. I just know from my experience I couldn't do it alone and having a good support system through the NA community and the positive influence of your friends here it is very possible. Detaching yourself from those people that use and the places where you like to use is a good step but getting to some meetings with people like you works wonders. That combined with the principles taught here you have a good chance of success. Good luck. And if you ever want to talk just shoot me a message.

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21 Apr 2012 15:03 #57072 by Alethea Thompson
Not that you have to take my advice, but because you said it: Don't knock the power of mind over matter, it's in that sort of thinking that negates the actual gift. ;)

Gather at the River,
Setanaoko Oceana

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21 Apr 2012 15:09 #57073 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
If it is what he thinks it is it's the mind that's the problem.

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21 Apr 2012 20:25 #57137 by Ben
Replied by Ben on topic Re: My drug addiction
I don't really have any advice on the matter as I have little experience to draw on, but I want you to know that I'm holding you in my thoughts.

Stay strong and please remember that we're here for you if you need us :)

B.Div | OCP
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21 Apr 2012 20:29 #57139 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
Thank you V-tog and everyone else once again.

While I'm going through this struggle I been concentrating heavily on my studies and this website. It is helping so much in terms of keeping my mind off the opiates.

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25 Apr 2012 09:54 #57723 by
Replied by on topic Counter Attack Strategies
I once had a friend who was dangerously addicted to cigarettes, and it was killing him. I was living in Denver, Colorado at the time and I had allowed him to live with me. We had many conversations about his addictions, and one method I was able to intuit to him was that every time he smoked a cigarette he would mentally affirm, aloud and in his mind, that he was choosing to smoke the cigarette. Not because he needed to, not because he had to, but because he was choosing to.

My theory was that if you gain control over the choice, then you are no longer addicted, because you take back the choice to do something, then you are automatically granted the power not to do it. (Psychologically, anyways, physical addiction is a different case.)

You see, addiction lies in our basic selves. The part of our being from which the more animalistic tendencies rise. I like to think of communicating things to this part of yourself like communicating with a young child. It doesn't understand higher reasoning, just like a child doesn't fathom that it shouldn't eat candy because of bad things that will happen at some point in the future. So you have to firmly, yet lovingly guide them in the right direction over time.

I don't know if you've already stopped cold turkey or if you're still trying to wean them out of your life, but even you still take them intermittently then I would recommend what I described.

If, however, you have stopped taking them altogether and are struggling not to relapse, I would add that affirmation to your efforts of meditation and thinking. Mentally assure all the levels of your core being that you chose to take opiates. Not because you NEED them, not because you HAD to, but because you CHOSE to. Then mentally affirm that you are now choosing sobriety.


Two more points. (I know this is getting rather lengthy, I apologize, brevity has never been my strong suit)

The first, is to look up the mystical principle of auto-suggestion, specifically before bed. This is the best time to create "self-laws". I recently read a book called "Practical Mysticism" that goes into this, and you can use this tool as a power aid to modify behavior and instill pattens that you wish embrace in your life.


The second, is that there exists the principle that the human mind cannot focus on the opposite of an idea. So if your focus to "Stop taking Opiates" Then you're still bombarding your being with thoughts of Opiates as being a goal. I would highly recommend setting your intention and focus on Sobriety. Clean, healthy, affirming sobriety. Your basic self, as mentioned earlier, responds to more intrinsic incentives, like fun and enjoyment. So imagine yourself in a lifestyle where you have a balance mood all time. A lifestyle where you can begin to hone your ability to tap into the Force. (Sobriety is best suited for psychic development.) Whatever excites you and entices you, include into your imaging of your ideal life, associate in your mind that you can achieve these things with sobriety.

To put it differently, give your basic self something to move towards and be excited about, and it will magnanimously enhance the progress you can make moving away from opiates.

In regards to the physical addiction, that is more immediate and difficult. I don't have experience with withdrawal symptoms from physical dependency so I cannot advise you on that, but I hope my perspective helps.


Lastly, do not be afraid to ask for active meditation and prayer concerning this. We are your community, and we want to see you heal from this. I've no doubt that your family and friends feel the same way. Arrange a time weekly when people pray for your in unison. (i.e. for 30 minutes every Monday at 10pm have all your friends and family and us here pray or meditate that you have the strength and grace to achieve complete sobriety)

Combined intention is a very powerful tool, it lowered crime rates in the city of New York, I know that it can help you conquer this demon.

May the Force be with you friend.

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28 Apr 2012 05:53 #58116 by
Replied by on topic Re: Counter Attack Strategies
Some would say find a naturopathic doctor that specializes in boosting normal hormone cycles. Quitting without a good plan to get healthy can be done, but making the decision to actively seek a more healthy lifestyle will give the drive you need. I know a lot of people are tired of me saying this, but juicing rocks!

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28 Apr 2012 11:26 - 28 Apr 2012 11:27 #58131 by
Replied by on topic My drug addiction
The OP hasn't been here for a few days. I'm not sure why, but one never expects the best when they know someone is hurting.
Perhaps we could send some thoughts, prayers, and/or energy his way?

May the Force be with us all.
Last edit: 28 Apr 2012 11:27 by .

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30 Apr 2012 02:08 #58341 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
I had similar experiences with my own mother, I can sympathize. I wish there was something I could do for you, some way to take on or suppress your desire. But the only thing I can truly offer you is an ear and the knowledge that you are in the mind of not only myself, but many of your fellow Jedi. Stay strong, the force shall guide and strengthen you, and we shall be here to aid you in any way we can. I know you can do it, I believe in you.

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12 Jun 2012 11:44 #63469 by
Replied by on topic Re: My drug addiction
This is a old topic so I should start by saying I hope you are well and that your strength is still strong.

I once dealt with drug addition and no after a decade of walking away from that life and dealing with it I can say yes it sucks but it is worth it. Like you I suffered enough effects on my body such as my heart is fairly jacked and if I live past 45 I will be thankful for every year I have over that.

What worked for me is the love and light of great friends and a strong mindset. Reiki was also a huge help for me and I would be more then happy to send it out to you. I heard that programs such as NA and AA server a purpose for such things but honestly I did not go that route and can not speak from personal experance in regards to such programs.

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