Ego or Confidence

I find people motivated to enhance their ego difficult to tolerate but I find confident people admirable. I think one can't be confident without a strong ego.

My question is can a person be confident and not be egotistic? What would seperate the two characteristics if they can be seperated?

This one is in the eye of the beholder.

Egoless confidence arises from realising something's necessary and just doing it, without a song and dance.

I disagree you can't be confident without ego. Zen is confidence without ego, you "become one" with and disappear inside the action.

I think it's often the other way around, that people who lack confidence are too aware of themselves to act as they know they should.

the ego is is the caving into social expectations, the abandonment of one's authenticity for the benefit of the feel good effects the ego provides. (such as social acceptance, "friends", popularity, etc)

Confidence is to ignore the ego trap and not engage in deceiving oneself into becoming inauthentic (being of "bad faith"). It is about serving the needs and desires of the true (authentic) self.

So, at least for the existentialist, ego and confidence really are opposites.

Not just caving into society.....

But, the steadfast belief that one is always right..

This too, would be ego, me thinks...

I am ssupremely confidant... But, have no issue (OK, little issue, lol) with being shown I'm wrong....

Some, just cannot handle that..

There is a difference! :huh:

You see...

I’m not conceded…

Just convinced ! :blink:

hahhahahha :woohoo: :silly: :laugh:

Jestor wrote: Not just caving into society.....

But, the steadfast belief that one is always right..

This too, would be ego, me thinks...

It's not though. That would be faith. Egotism is about making yourself feel more important, more appreciated, more "grand".

Everyone believes they are right, until that belief changes, in which case they hold the new belief as right. The only people who could genuinely not fall into this are people who are completely apathetic and have no opinion whatsoever about anything. (One of the reasons why some people believe that living wu-wei implies living as a hermit)

Anyway, if someone believes that it is right not to be grand, not to seek appreciation, etc (see Jedi creed), and that they wont bulge on the "rightness" of those beliefs, are they still egotistical to you Jestor?

Jestor wrote:
I am ssupremely confidant... ..

You'd have to be with that avatar. :laugh:

For me when you are confident you truly respect others, listen to them, pay attention to what they say, agree with whatever parts of their perspective that you can agree with, and respect their right to disagree.

When you are egotiscal you do not listen to others nor respect their opinions or ideas. You get your way by intimidation and bullying and you feel entitled because you believe you are superior to others.

I admit I have difficulty dealing with egotiscal people.

Maturity is balancing the ego with sympathy. Egotistical people strive for win/lose scenarios. While charismatic people strive for win/win scenarios.