Discussion: TotJO Culture Problems

If I had any concern for this Temple it would be everyone's preoccupation with how everyone else is acting.(see what I did there? Even I am not immune!)

Concern yourself with self reflection. Never push "post" until you leave it alone and come back and read it again later. Question your motives. What do you hope to gain by posting what your about to post? Attack your own arguments. Recognize the ones fueled by bad experiences. Question what your assuming just by speaking up. Consider, always, that you are missing information. If you get good at it, you start to know what you need to know. Always give the benefit of the doubt to others...there simply is not enough information to assume malice.

If you want to call someone out, call yourself out.

rugadd wrote: If you want to call someone out, call yourself out.

Love this. Several times over the past 48 hours I've found myself responding very angrily... but deleting the post before hitting post. Sometimes I just see it's my own ego talking, and not myself.

Love this lil nugget of wisdom.

"Always give the benefit of the doubt to others...there simply is not enough information to assume malice."


Words, just words...

You haven't seen how we pass policy here, you've not seen how people conduct themselves behind closed doors, I have. As always, it's not what you know, it's what you can prove, and after six years knowing people working behind the curtain (Perris, Brenna, Relish, Marta Lina) and then only to have every thing validated when making advisor....

I can prove quite a bit, I am, however honor bound not to resort to such tactics. The longer I stay, the more I come to the stark conclusion staring me in the face that I simply do not belong....

Arisaig wrote:

rugadd wrote: If you want to call someone out, call yourself out.

Love this. Several times over the past 48 hours I've found myself responding very angrily... but deleting the post before hitting post. Sometimes I just see it's my own ego talking, and not myself.

Love this lil nugget of wisdom.

Very well said! We must be accountable for all our actions so what better way to prevent that than by not doing it in the first place? (err, I mean, the negative ones!).

You raise good points, Vlad, and part of what we are working on is a way to hold people actually accountable on both sides. A document clearly explaining updated policy is in the works.
Simple expectations for behavior will be laid out and available for all to read. Moderators, Councillors and Security Officers will be more open and required to explain their actions so that they can be reviewed or reversed if necessary. Those deemed in violation will be asked to review certain lessons or complete new ones to demonstrate that they have an understanding of what happened and why it was considered a violation.

Obviously this is a work in progress and will require some trial and error as we learn what works and what doesn't. We will also have to be patient with each other as new policy is implemented and put to actual use.

Make no mistake. There is concerted effort going on from numerous Councillors, Clergy and Knights to create a paradigm shift in this Temple. We are working toward patient and compassionate interaction on a consistent basis and firm but fair action to prevent otherwise. It will be hard and we will make mistakes, but the desire to be better is there and we agree that now is the time to put up or shut up. I realize this has all been said before (you've seen it a thousand times, and few times from my own mouth Zenchi ), but I truly believe that there is momentum building.

Where there is doubt, faith.

Zen, that would be a completely different situation. 1) Giving the benefit of the doubt means there is doubt. If you believe you have proved to yourself that there is malice, then there is malice. 2) The culture and community here aren't the people behind the curtain, as you refer to them. This thread is about what those of us out here can do. Only thing I care about right now is listening to ideas on how I can help make things better.

I'm sorry, man. I give too much of my heart and energy to what we do here to have people imply I'm throwing it away. But I'd be happy to talk with you more in PM, if you'd like.