How to Find Out If Your Penis Is a Normal Size

I have been through a world of experiences where I was in positions that all was on display. And a lot of what I worried about depended a lot on my personal self-image at the time. When I was younger I believed that I was quite handsome… a lady killer so to say, and so I did not worry about it when I lived in a nudist colony. When I joined the military, I was nervous about how I would “add up” to the other men I was around. Young men can be quite cruel if you happen to be the odd man out. But I noticed, that all the guys seemed to be rather concerned with this and tended towards a level of… I can’t think of a word, but no one “strutted their stuff” so I figured this was a common concern and left it alone. As I got older and life taught me more about how the world really works, I noticed that in the pecking order of male dominance it was more about perceived masculinity as most guys have almost a homophobic fear of looking at another guy’s penis to see who is actually bigger. When it came to women, it seemed that as long as I “did well” and they were happy then it was all good and it seemed that I wasn’t being compared with other guys, so it didn’t really matter there either.

Long story short… when I hit puberty, sure I had the same concerns that all others guys seem to have. But as my self-image developed and I grew old and wiser I found out that it does not matter as much as I may have thought it did at first. This also helped me to have decent confidence and a more solid self-image. Rather women, or others guys care to admit, guys worry about things that many would publicly admit to being dumb or unimportant. But not having these things sorted in a young man’s life can lead to long term issues and ultimately problems with how they relate to others, of both sexes, and the relationships they build.

I am glad we are having this discussion and hope that some share stories or related events that our younger, and some older members, may read and gain assurances from.

Wescli Wardest wrote: I am glad we are having this discussion and hope that some share stories or related events that our younger, and some older members, may read and gain assurances from.

I'm a fan of kink and bondage.

Miss_Leah wrote: ...We don't go around demanding to see the goods before we get to know a guy.

You bring up an interesting point. I believe Louis C.K. phrased it like this:


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In all seriousness, though, the only time I've ever heard of someone other than the owner of the penis in question putting importance on the size of it is when said person is just looking for a good time and not an actual relationship. Just my 2¢.

Wescli Wardest wrote: I am glad we are having this discussion and hope that some share stories or related events that our younger, and some older members, may read and gain assurances from.

If we're gonna share stories for assurance purposes, here's mine:

I'm a woman who has what I believe is a fairly average level of sexual experience.

...scratch that, I looked it up and apparently, it's higher than average

And I can tell you with all honestly that out of about 15 partners over the course of my 31 years, only two were so big that it was noticeable (9+ inches) and one was so small that it was noticeable (2-ish inches). All the rest, whether they were statistically average or not, were a size that didn't affect the quality of sex so much as overall sexual skill did - size didn't even register as a factor.

The guy who was very small..Now, while he small enough to register as such in my mind, had an enthusiasm and eagerness to please that made the experience great fun. So really, personality trumped size.

And out of the two that were "too big": one just happened to be into SM/dominance and pushing the limits of pain/pleasure - and he was good at it - so it all kind worked in his favour. The other though, was just plain awful. He assumed that size was all he needed and had no concept of sexual finesse or that fact that he needed to make any effort at all to ensure the pleasure of his partner.

So really, in my personal experience (and I did the actual math, lol), 80% of time time, size wasn't a factor at all (skills was); 13% of the time, size was a factor, but skill trumped it; and only 7% of the time, size was an actual handicap (and even then, mostly due to ignorance)

While I can't help you lads when it comes to male "in-fighting" over size, I can certainly tell you that most of the time, we'll judge you on your skills as a lover (which are very easy to learn, btw) and not the size of your penis.

Akkarin wrote:

Wescli Wardest wrote: I am glad we are having this discussion and hope that some share stories or related events that our younger, and some older members, may read and gain assurances from.

I'm a fan of kink and bondage.

Who isn't?

I imagine that one of the reasons it seems to be a concern to “guy” is because sex is such a prevalent part of our society. Whether anyone else has considered it, I can see how the common place of sex has put a sense of “worth” of physical attributes and not so much end product or outcome.

Let me have a sec and I will try to explain from a guy’s possible point of view or thought process. We see sex, or sexy people or are told what is attractive. In fact, we are all bombarded by this all throughout the day. It has been discussed several times in different forums and Medias how photo shopping models and the use of sex for advertising has had a detrimental effect on the development and psyche of young women. This results in unhealthy self-images and practices where young, and some older women, try to achieve unreachable goals of beauty. It also effect young men negatively. We are also taught that value is in physical attributes. Size does matter!?!? Young men tend to be told that large breast are more attractive then smaller ones. In some social groups a large rear is way better than a tiny one, and in others it is reversed to the point you wonder how the woman has the butt muscles to walk. It’s quite ridiculous in my opinion.

So these “guys” are taught what is attractive and of course they talk amongst themselves… and young, uneducated minds are so easily influenced. So they chase after what is supposed to be attractive and in return, try to impress the ones they are pursuing by being that “ideal” guy. And in a twisted way, they figure that if larger breasts are “in demand” then it merits that larger penises would be sought. How many people have gone down the aisle where men’s underwear is sold? Some of those models look like they have two squires fighting in their shorts! To a young, just hitting puberty guy, this can be an impossible dream to aspire to.

And I think one of the things that makes it worse is that we are not comfortable talking about it. So we make jokes… like women should get to see the penis as a prerequisite to dating. I think that for most guys that would be a horrifying experience.

Some guys boast a sense of false bravado in efforts to disguise their insecurities. Which has been what seems to be an effective way of dealing with it instead of talking about it. If one is questioned of his masculinity the other will offer to show it if they want to “know for sure.” Then, either the guy backs down or calls the bluff. If the bluff is called then the other calls him a faggot for wanting to see his junk. Thus securing his place of male dominance. And as a side effect, programming other guys to shun homosexuals and breeding intolerance and prejudice.

It seems to all be a vicious cycle revolving around keeping people from being uncomfortable facing the actual issues… not getting things out in the open and discovering the truth.

And women, no matter what the advertisements say or show, I will be the first to tell you that men are just happy you give us a chance! Small, large, lopsided… we do NOT care. I would venture to guess that 99.9% of straight men are just thrilled when we are at the point in a relationship where we get to see them. Playing with them is a freaking bonus! :ohmy: :woohoo: Sorry, that was kind of crude. But completely true. And no matter what guys tell you, they really have no idea what they’re doing until you teach them. So talk to them. Tell them. Otherwise they will continue to fumble around, clueless, and no one wins then.

Wescli Wardest wrote: And no matter what guys tell you, they really have no idea what they’re doing until you teach them. So talk to them. Tell them. Otherwise they will continue to fumble around, clueless, and no one wins then.

I can't tell you how important this is, but it also goes for women. Communication = you know what each other likes = better sex = infinite pleasure. There's nothing better than a little hand-on experience. Yeah, you'll start out being a noob, but the learning curve (or, "learning curves", if you will *snicker*) is in your favour.

Miss_Leah wrote: While I can't help you lads when it comes to male "in-fighting" over size, I can certainly tell you that most of the time, we'll judge you on your skills as a lover (which are very easy to learn, btw) and not the size of your penis.

The entertainment value of this thread is almost equal to the knowledge value, lol...

Im glad we arent too stiff in our conversations....

Oh, ALSO,

The size of a man's penis when it comes to sex is often completely subjective because women's vaginal canals vary greatly in size/shape as well. And just like penises, the size of the woman does not correlate to the size of her vagina.

Jestor wrote:
The entertainment value of this thread is almost equal to the knowledge value, lol...

Im glad we arent too stiff in our conversations....

well its a hard topic to get a handle on, but so far the community has been up to it