I sit here on my couch, thinking what to say..... My last "Sermon" was a copy of a passage I really liked, and my thoughts on it......  Not sure how this sounds to you guys and gals, but, we'll see......

The other day, the wife and I went to the local hardware store to purchase some supplies for our Halloween setup.....

We tried this a couple of weeks ago as well... It did not work then either...... We got into a disagreement, and left with no purchases....

Why did we have a disagreement? I cannot fathom the reasons.... Why does anyone?

I am currently upset with myself.... Not terribly, but nonetheless, not happy...... I let my emotions run amuck...

I, as most of you know, try to greet each and every person, new to TOTJO....  Lately, it seems that controlling of anger has been a major thing people want to learn...... Why?

It can have adverse effects on many aspects of a persons life, such as, but in no way limited to, employment, friendship, family, physical health, mental health, the list seems too long to completely list here......

Why does it seem that people have less control over their anger, versus a generation ago?

Is it because, we were/are told to "get it off our chest", "It's bad to let it build up, you'll crack", "you'll feel better"?  Whereas the older generation were told to "suck it up", "play the cards we're dealt", "be an adult",  and "quit whining".

I think it might be....

In one of the lessons, I learned I had been training myself, with negative reinforcement, to respond with hostility.....

When I "tell a person off", I feel better.  But then my irritation with that person soon swells again, due to that person not changing, to them, what is a perfectly fine action or idea. All I did, was make them angry/upset/irritated with me.

The cycle continues.... Thereby, reinforcing this negative action... And every time I would feel better, it would go away more quickly. Since figuring this out about myself, I have started watching the interactions of those around me, most noticeably, my co-workers and my family.

It is not an easy thing to change a known bad habit, let alone a habit that we don't even know we have developed..... After all, if it makes us feel good, and gets rid of the emotional poison, it must be right, right?

I think, we stopped thinking about the rights and feelings of other people. We forgot our original intention of grouping together was for safety and security. Mutual respect abounded. Didn't like the tribe you were with? Go find another. Or start your own with like minded people.

Every day I meet someone I didn't know the day before. Everyday, my tribe gets bigger, the world becomes a smaller place. 

Not everyone of them is going to go along with my outlook. Some, will probably will tell me how wrong I am.

That's ok.  They are allowed that right. I may, after all, be wrong.

Perception of the situation, the perspective of the situation, your interpretation, your opinion, your outlook, your point-of-view.....

Look around, and see if there is another way to look at the situation.... See if you can see what they are trying to say, understand where they are coming from.....

Well, anyhow, this is my "perception and perspective".....

 What's yours?

Comments (4)

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Well written, this is why in my own studies I have striven to explore as many belief systems and broaden my own perspective so that I can understand some more of the many views of the world. <br /><br />I have never been one to anger, though I do...

Well written, this is why in my own studies I have striven to explore as many belief systems and broaden my own perspective so that I can understand some more of the many views of the world. <br /><br />I have never been one to anger, though I do sometimes enjoy playing devil's advocate and seeing how a discussion may go. Personally, I do not like letting my emotions out in a form that harms another that is not ready to be harmed... Now along those lines, I sometimes allow my emotions out while playing a video game or airsofting where the point is to harm the opponent anyway... so that I can release some of those emotions in a way that does not push the bonds of friendships and relationships. It may not always fix a problem, but it tends to keep my emotions at a manageable level. <br /><br />As to the item of how we are raised... I was raised not to cry or show emotions by my grandparents and great-grandmother who spent most of my childhood with and I don't believe that is the answer to the problem of emotions hurting others... in those days where that was commonplace, people got in fistfights to resolve issues and is that any better than an argument or hurting one's feelings? <br /><br />My perspective of the issue is that we hold on to actions of the past and allow them to anger us, living in the here and now and letting go of that past anger seems like it could benefit us all<br /><br />Also, a line from the jedi holocron comes to mind... "Accept you're emotions, but do not let them control you"<br />We all are going to have emotions, and we all handle them in different ways, it is not how we hide them, but how they surface<br /><br />And that is my Perception & Perspective <br />:-) Sorry Jestor If this response is a bit huge

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I agree with what you said. I do also think that some of it may be the differences in generations. I don't think it is a complete cause of our anger issues though. I think just the way our society is and how it differed from 50 years ago would...

I agree with what you said. I do also think that some of it may be the differences in generations. I don't think it is a complete cause of our anger issues though. I think just the way our society is and how it differed from 50 years ago would have a big thing to do with some of the anger. Part of mine is due to a lack of patience. We are in a society where everything is fast, when it goes slow it bothers us. 50 years ago people were not as dependent on things we are now, so having to wait was something normal to them.<br /><br />I too used to negatively re-enforce my problem traits. I would yell or get angry and feel better for a short time, but then the situation would come to mind again and I would be even angrier. When I tried stopping, it was less of a problem.

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My intention, wasn't to say that holding the feelings in was a healthy alternative.  Instead, what I was saying as people took the "getting it off your chest", to a extreme.  Where it was more commonplace for our elders to deal with the small...

My intention, wasn't to say that holding the feelings in was a healthy alternative.  Instead, what I was saying as people took the "getting it off your chest", to a extreme.  Where it was more commonplace for our elders to deal with the small inconveniences of life without whining about every little thing.<br /><br />The incessant complaining, whining and b*tching, that has become so common a place in society, is more to what I refer. After so long, just complaining out loud isn't enough, some take to the verbal attack, even the physical.   Road rage was unheard of twenty years ago.  Now we watch the more amusing ones on YouTube and TV....<br /><br />It is perfectly acceptable to discuss a valid point, or an issue. How many people do we all know that only seem happy, when they are complaining? They guy in front of them is driving too slow, he is not using his turn signal, the lady writing a check for $3.00. The whole world is too slow, too ignorant, just trying to prevent them, from going about their day.<br /><br />The constantly "angry at the world" folks.<br /><br />My boss, he is one of these, I see him more than I see most other people.  I watch and listen to him talk about the other drivers, other employees, bosses, spouses and children.  I have also seen him self-depreciate, about his turn signal, his temper, his work ethic. Quite the interesting person, he is. <br /><br />So many people, do not realize the negative energy they put out into the world. They don't know how to, or what to do, to deal with this energy.<br /><br />The older generations, thought (most did, it would seem to me) first, acted second... They weren't as prone to fly off the handle such as some of the people today. They took the time to evaluate.....  <br />[------------------------------------]<br />And what you say is true, Cynthia, the world is moving faster all them time. And the speed is does indeed cause frustration when we expect fast results and fail to get them.<br /><br />And I think, for me in that regard, I am trying to change. My phone, is now a tool, no longer the "extension" of me I thought was so important to me, months ago. Lines at the store don't bother me, the guy wanting to start a conversation in the gas station is no longer holding me up from anything, the extra few minutes here and there, not a big deal anymore.

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There has been a lot of anger around recently - I see it in my friends, in members of the public, even from responses to some posts here. I think you are right to question why this is - perhaps there is something deeper that needs to be addressed...

There has been a lot of anger around recently - I see it in my friends, in members of the public, even from responses to some posts here. I think you are right to question why this is - perhaps there is something deeper that needs to be addressed in each case . Mikao Usui (founder of the systems of Reiki) had this to say:<br />"Do not bear anger, for it is illusion". I try to meditate on each aspect of this saying whenever I feel angry. But that's not always possible when I'm in full furious flow! As Jedi we strive to not suppress our emotions, or to let them control us, but to learn from them. Recognising and acknowledging is the first step to understanding.<br /><br />Excellent sermon, Jestor - it always feels more relevant and personal when spoken from the heart :)<br /><br />MTFBWY

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