You can't always get what you want ...

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14 Mar 2019 18:58 #335601 by Arisaig
Replied by Arisaig on topic You can't always get what you want ...

ren wrote: I'm questioning what appears to be a double standard... In your initial post in this thread.

- there's nothing wrong with public discussions.
- when someone posts a cryptic quote it is best to ask for clarifications rather than claim the poster is unable to share their own thougths.
- attacking the source instead of the content serves no purpose.
- assuming someone is slapping you in the face when they may very well not be doing so has a tendency to escalate a perceived tension into actual tensions.


No double standard. If anyone takes my PM's into a public setting that is purposefully about discussing it TO ME, yes, I will have qualms with it.

1) I agree
2) I DID. He refused to answer, and after 8 hours, decided instead to make a forum post about it.
3) What am I to attack for the content? Rock and Roll? Seriously?
4) I don't assume. Because HE IS.
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14 Mar 2019 19:01 #335603 by TobiasGeisel
I am not sure if Br. John thinks, he is far above you.. Br. John, if you read this, it would be easier to understand the situation if you said something about it? What was your intention? (Right now I am not sure if I should just stop to interfere here, I just don´t like situations were people get hurt or angry or both, especially if this happens due to a possible misunderstanding.)

You must unlearn what you have learned.

Apprentice, Teaching Master: Rosalyn J
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14 Mar 2019 19:04 #335604 by ZealotX

Arisaig wrote:

TobiasGeisel wrote: Wow, Arisaig, you seem to be really angry. Are you sure, Br. John was trying to hurt you? Were you, Br. John?


I'm not angry. I'm confused as to why he seems to be ignoring me, after never talking to me, only to suddenly send me lyrics of a song. Then, when I ask why, he decides I'm SO below him he needs someone else to explain this to me in a public setting.

This is spiteful, and this is a flex I will not tolerate.


It's possible that he was responding to something you said or asked for in public thread, privately and was trying to give you counsel or advice using a popular song lyric. If he thought you were showing impatience or some anxiety about something then this would make sense. At any rate most people are probably going to take one look and assume he was trying to help you and you bit his face off for it. Even if he took it public, since the lyric was shared with you in private you were completely anonymous until you decided to let us know you were that someone. If he was trying to embarrass you publicly you would not have needed to reveal who he was talking about. And as far as being below him, this seems to be coming from your own mind instead of anyone else's. I accept that I could be wrong but you seem to be projecting this idea that he's flexing even though you admit that the two of you never speak so how would you know? Rather, at the moment you seem a bit overly defensive. And I know personally, I'm not here to attack you so when I see you defensive like this I just want to say something to help and diffuse an elevated situation. Perhaps he was trying to do the same. Breathe.
The following user(s) said Thank You: elizabeth
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14 Mar 2019 19:06 #335605 by ZealotX

TobiasGeisel wrote: I am not sure if Br. John thinks, he is far above you.. Br. John, if you read this, it would be easier to understand the situation if you said something about it? What was your intention? (Right now I am not sure if I should just stop to interfere here, I just don´t like situations were people get hurt or angry or both, especially if this happens due to a possible misunderstanding.)


Well now that it is out there and probably not what Bro John intended I don't think discussing it in public would be helpful for him since he didn't intend to publicly embarrass or humiliate anyone.
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14 Mar 2019 19:07 #335606 by Arisaig
Replied by Arisaig on topic You can't always get what you want ...

ZealotX wrote:

Arisaig wrote:

TobiasGeisel wrote: Wow, Arisaig, you seem to be really angry. Are you sure, Br. John was trying to hurt you? Were you, Br. John?


I'm not angry. I'm confused as to why he seems to be ignoring me, after never talking to me, only to suddenly send me lyrics of a song. Then, when I ask why, he decides I'm SO below him he needs someone else to explain this to me in a public setting.

This is spiteful, and this is a flex I will not tolerate.


It's possible that he was responding to something you said or asked for in public thread, privately and was trying to give you counsel or advice using a popular song lyric. If he thought you were showing impatience or some anxiety about something then this would make sense. At any rate most people are probably going to take one look and assume he was trying to help you and you bit his face off for it. Even if he took it public, since the lyric was shared with you in private you were completely anonymous until you decided to let us know you were that someone. If he was trying to embarrass you publicly you would not have needed to reveal who he was talking about. And as far as being below him, this seems to be coming from your own mind instead of anyone else's. I accept that I could be wrong but you seem to be projecting this idea that he's flexing even though you admit that the two of you never speak so how would you know? Rather, at the moment you seem a bit overly defensive. And I know personally, I'm not here to attack you so when I see you defensive like this I just want to say something to help and diffuse an elevated situation. Perhaps he was trying to do the same. Breathe.


I've had hours to breathe. He continues to ignore. If he was simply responding to something i had put in another forum post, he could have said so simply in the PM. BUT NO. Instead, he needs OTHERS to explain his PM to me. This makes it clear he meant something by it, beyond a forum post response, but he cannot (either because he thinks himself above it or because he is incapable of using his own words) somehow respond to me.
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14 Mar 2019 19:07 #335607 by Arisaig
Replied by Arisaig on topic You can't always get what you want ...

ZealotX wrote:

TobiasGeisel wrote: I am not sure if Br. John thinks, he is far above you.. Br. John, if you read this, it would be easier to understand the situation if you said something about it? What was your intention? (Right now I am not sure if I should just stop to interfere here, I just don´t like situations were people get hurt or angry or both, especially if this happens due to a possible misunderstanding.)


Well now that it is out there and probably not what Bro John intended I don't think discussing it in public would be helpful for him since he didn't intend to publicly embarrass or humiliate anyone.


I agree. He's embarrassed himself enough. Hence why I requested the change to Knights Forums.
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14 Mar 2019 19:13 #335608 by elizabeth
He may just simply wish others opinions on the quote.
Not intending anything else
You seem to be making it personal.
What did you think about the quote?
Need and want are often confused especially if we are emotional.

I never loose.


TM Karn
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14 Mar 2019 19:19 #335609 by ZealotX

Arisaig wrote:

ZealotX wrote:

Arisaig wrote:

TobiasGeisel wrote: Wow, Arisaig, you seem to be really angry. Are you sure, Br. John was trying to hurt you? Were you, Br. John?


I'm not angry. I'm confused as to why he seems to be ignoring me, after never talking to me, only to suddenly send me lyrics of a song. Then, when I ask why, he decides I'm SO below him he needs someone else to explain this to me in a public setting.

This is spiteful, and this is a flex I will not tolerate.


It's possible that he was responding to something you said or asked for in public thread, privately and was trying to give you counsel or advice using a popular song lyric. If he thought you were showing impatience or some anxiety about something then this would make sense. At any rate most people are probably going to take one look and assume he was trying to help you and you bit his face off for it. Even if he took it public, since the lyric was shared with you in private you were completely anonymous until you decided to let us know you were that someone. If he was trying to embarrass you publicly you would not have needed to reveal who he was talking about. And as far as being below him, this seems to be coming from your own mind instead of anyone else's. I accept that I could be wrong but you seem to be projecting this idea that he's flexing even though you admit that the two of you never speak so how would you know? Rather, at the moment you seem a bit overly defensive. And I know personally, I'm not here to attack you so when I see you defensive like this I just want to say something to help and diffuse an elevated situation. Perhaps he was trying to do the same. Breathe.


I've had hours to breathe. He continues to ignore. If he was simply responding to something i had put in another forum post, he could have said so simply in the PM. BUT NO. Instead, he needs OTHERS to explain his PM to me. This makes it clear he meant something by it, beyond a forum post response, but he cannot (either because he thinks himself above it or because he is incapable of using his own words) somehow respond to me.


Let's take it slow. First, I don't know Bro. John's schedule. It would be one thing if you could see his movements on the site and knew he was hanging around. He could also be observing to see if and how things calm down. Sometimes when you sense heightened emotions it is best to allow the conversation to cool off a little. And IF (note: I'm not automatically saying you're wrong) you are misinterpreting his intentions because you are upset then its not necessarily his responsibility to rush in to assure you otherwise. Honestly, my first reaction was that you were blowing the whole thing out of proportion because you were upset. You think he meant "something" by it but you do not know what. So to me it is possible that he meant nothing negative by it and you're jumping to a conclusion to support your hostile reaction. Without him saying really anything you have already concluded several negative things about him. And then your response, even though you're not clear about his intentions, is clearly intended to call him out on your personal perception of him; a perception that is filtered through the lens of a negative reaction. What if that reaction is wrong? What if your assumptions are incorrect? Wouldn't you have embarrassed yourself? And if he wanted that outcome why did he not call YOU out? By name. Saying all this, let me again stress, I'm not attacking you. My knee jerk reaction was to try and help diffuse the tension. If I come off any other way to you I apologize.
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14 Mar 2019 19:19 #335610 by Br. John



Founder of The Order
~
I am the Master Cylinder and I live on the moon.
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14 Mar 2019 19:22 - 14 Mar 2019 19:33 #335611 by Arisaig
Replied by Arisaig on topic You can't always get what you want ...
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NO. YOUR WORDS. Be a Jedi and ANSWER
Last edit: 14 Mar 2019 19:33 by Arisaig.
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