Does attachment distract us from helping others

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7 years 1 month ago #276574 by
Most people find some form of romance in their lifetime in some form or shape and i would like to ask the question does it hurt people when we decide to form attachtments if we find ourselves distracted by this person and everything about them is that a weakness?

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7 years 1 month ago #276576 by Tellahane
Like all things it comes to a manner of how you perceive it. I find my wife to be a very helpful part to the process because not only does she help out with things when it gets crazy shes the closest person to me to call me out when I'm going too far or doing too much, or things just hit the fan to be there for support, just as I do the same for her.

Don't get me completely wrong there are some situations where a spouse cause more problems then it helps, but that generally is not a favorable relationship in the first place.
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  • Whyte Horse
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7 years 1 month ago #276579 by Whyte Horse
Yes. You can love without becoming attached. Otherwise, you become like this guy

Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.

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  • RyuJin
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7 years 1 month ago #276581 by RyuJin
Attachment is simply the inability to let go of something when the time comes... it's not the same as an emotional bond, which is what most relationships are... But the 2 can sometimes be difficult to separate...if you can separate them then it is possible to love, and when the time comes let go if it.

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7 years 1 month ago #276582 by Kit
In short, yes it can hurt other people, but calling it a weakness is a non sequitur.

Everything you do has both a positive and negative results. The point is to weigh those and decide what's worth doing, both for yourself and those around you.

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7 years 1 month ago #276590 by Alexandre Orion
:)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qslo4-DpzPs

Be a philosopher ; but, amidst all your philosophy, be still a man.
~ David Hume

Chaque homme a des devoirs envers l'homme en tant qu'homme.
~ Henri Bergson
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7 years 1 month ago #276591 by
Does attachment distract us from helping others ?

It can when the attachment is draining , but when your attachment gives you energy like it should it should be an even better foundation to help others :)

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7 years 1 month ago #276608 by Breeze el Tierno
There is a fair amount of room between loving someone and being distratcted by their weaknesses. Yes, of course the people we love are flawed in their ways. They have growing to do.

And the same is true of every one of us.

Seeing them as weak isn't loving them. At that point, it is not their weaknesses that are getting in the way, but our judgements, our need for them to be perfect, or at least better, before we can really regard them as lovable.

And that is generally a statement about ourselves.

Be very careful that you aren't doing the following:

-finding a person who lacks a certain confidence, someone you can dominate
-convincing yourself that they are somehow broken
-convincing yourself that you can fix them, trying to convince them of the same
-and trying to 'tough love' them into your vision of wellness or strength
-and all of this shore up your ego because if you can fix a person, you must be good...

But none of this works and is bad for the both of you. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. But give it some thought.
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7 years 1 month ago #276611 by Manu
So, to rephrase, you are asking whether loving one person with all your might takes away the time and energyy required to love a bunch of people superficially?

The answer is yes. But calling the former attachment and the latter altruism seems like a stretch to me.

The pessimist complains about the wind;
The optimist expects it to change;
The realist adjusts the sails.
- William Arthur Ward

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7 years 1 month ago #276628 by Carlos.Martinez3
It is every humans right to seek a balance in their own life. When I began to study my own path I realized I could directly influence me. If you find things distracting we have every right to meditate or ... Think on it. We have every right to " cognitively re frame " our own self. This takes the does love distract idea and put it next to those like why am I distracted and why can't I have the character I want. Changes views a bit .
As Jedi we are real life encouraged to love and live . Please love ! Please choose to be alive ! Please share the sun and the cold . A Jedi love is greater than any
I know , I give it every day !
No one can ever say to me my love is weak : no one can ever say my love is not love . That's Kinna the idea , once u find your idea of love and build it then really ... No one can say it's .... Distracting or weak. My family doesn't . I would love to see the day when each of us say ... To ourself a and to our family... I have love . I don't need some one else's idea or medias idea or even the common idea . Our love is something so worth it ... Seek ! And you will find ! I have found mine and you will as well , hopefully some day we will stop seeing love as ... Weak and distracting . We will build it and make it ... What we really want !!!? I have you can too!!!

Pastor of Temple of the Jedi Order
pastor@templeofthejediorder.org
Build, not tear down.
Nosce te ipsum / Cerca trova
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