I have always been here...
Three well respected Knights reminded me over the past week that it has been a while since I've interacted much in the general forums. Indeed, my evanescence started about a year or so ago and has continued 'til I'm nearly invisible. Thus, many people do not know who I am beyond a mention in a few places that I serve on the Council and hold an office. At the same time, my duties to the Temple and my lovely family of apprentices - and their apprentices now too - take up a lot of my existential bandwidth ( like I'm a radio or something, right ? ). And any of you who do know me know quite well that I rarely click away on the keyboard spitting out just anything in reaction to what others have said ; when I do say something, I make it evident that I've been pondering the matter for a while. That is how I am in off-line life too. In action, I am pretty spontaneous, whereas in expression, I'm meticulous as all hell ...
Anyway, yesterday evening, I asked a friend - another proven and trustworthy Knight - what I ought to do about this absence. I know ... it ought to be self evident, right ? Just participate ! Well, it really isn't that simple. For example, the other day, there was one of those big, blow-up threads popped up just as I was heading out of the flat for a couple of hours. I pondered the subject during my walk into town ... When I got back a couple of hours later - and after two or three conversations with others - I have apprentices, one of whom is the Pastor of the Temple- over various media (and one actually in person - can you imagine ??), the thread was nine pages long and full of vitriol. Enough for me to say "screw that !"
So, like I was saying : this apparent apathy ( I promise you all, it isn't apathy at all ) toward the members of the TotJO at large does bother me, so I was asking a friend what I ought to do about it. She suggested "start a thread." Wouldn't you know ... it took me all bloody day to figure out what I wanted to start a thread about. Lots of things went through my head : concepts like justice/fairness ; the ways that our Doctrine points to cultivating virtue (and how it fails to do) ; what our TotJO rankings purvey and what they do not ; questioning what people want to learn here in the TotJO, what we actually do learn and what we perhaps ought to learn. But then, how would that help you all get to know me ? How would just getting to know me connect to or demonstrate my position in the Temple ???
Besides that, if I start a thread on one or any of those topics, it would only derail slightly. Since this thread is for you to know how to get to know me and what I have to share on the many ways of the Jedi and the pan-patho-somo-logos of the Force, I want it to derail -- often, in fact. That is why I'm putting it in Jediism and not in Journals, for it is not a journal (though I will endeavour to say something here about every day). Please, rant at me, ask questions, ask or offer help here... Let's use this as a space for interaction, for encounter, for meeting and relation. Let it derail, sink, take flight and/or just generally get as out-of-control and blind as a bat as things tend to get. Only let's make it enjoyable ... (so, if you bitch at me, make it entertaining)
As I got to know you a little better, I began to realize that your way of thinking is far deeper than most and you truly contemplate life. A LOT. Sometimes your words go over my head, but I appreciate the challenge.
I've also discovered that when asking you for book suggestions, I do so at my own risk! I could read a new book every day until I die and I'm pretty sure I'd never finish your list. I get why you and your Apprentices sometimes refer to you as "the Ol' Bastard".
I guess what I'm saying is, as I've gotten to know you, you have become a valuable resource to me when I need someone to get me questioning things again. You spark my curiosity in ways that few others can. So, keep on sharing, even if you are just inviting people to tea. I think I'm finally beginning to understand that gesture now.
Knight of the Order - Security Officer - Knight Adviser
Teaching Master: Senior Knight tzb Apprentices: Vladucard , thomaswfaulkner
Senan's Journal | Senan's Health Journey | The Art of Senan
Strengthen the weary hands. Make firm the feeble knees. Say to the anxious: "Be strong, fear not, for the Force is with us."
Senan wrote: I get why you and your Apprentices sometimes refer to you as "the Ol' Bastard"
Edit: Love you really Maitre
Alexandre Orion wrote: You know how when little children about three or four years old start asking "why ?" about everything ? Well, I never quite got out of that phase...
Growing up is boring anyways XD lol
Connor L. wrote: You annoy me. Mostly because I'm not smart enough to understand what you're saying half the time.
Yes, you are ; if you don't understand, please don't be annoyed, just ask about it. The stuff I talk about only sounds complicated because it doesn't lend itself to language precision very well. Some things are only clumsily expressible - others, only attainable via allegory. Understanding can be negotiated ... the only thing is : it has to remain a present understanding -- it can never become a "have understood".