Profile for Leena Anne Dawes (Leena)

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  • OFFLINE
  • Rank: Apprentice
  • Register Date: 24 Jan 2009
  • Last Visit Date: 31 Aug 2013
  • Time Zone: GMT +0:00
  • Local Time: 18:34
  • Posts: 192
  • Thank you received: 37
  • Profile Views: 1630
  • Location: Sacramento
  • Gender: Female
  • Birthdate: 18 Dec 1987

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Training Master: Mark Anjuu
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    • The 'Real Me' (Last post by Exarchias)
    • My two cents :) Personaly i do not care so much to be real me, (i do not really know my real me), and i care instead to be solid in that what i am doing. My humble opinion is that the real me of any person is not hidden in the personal details but in that what defines every person: for example. If John Macdo (just a random name) likes trains, the real me of John Macdo is not the name but the fact that he likes trains. Personaly i guess the closest thing to my real me is my poker face. Solid as stone and cold as ice.
    • Workout Check-In Thread (Last post by Exarchias)
    • Vacations in Germany 20 x 3 x (2 hands) 5 kg biceps 20 x 3 push ups 20 x 3 air squats 20 x 3 x (2 hands) 5 kg biceps
    • Who's your favorite philosopher? (Last post by Edan)
    • "Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one." "Swiftly each particle of matter vanishes into the universal Substance; swiftly each item of causation is reassumed into the universal Reason; swiftly the rememberance of all things is buried in the gulf of eternity." "Let not the future disturb you. You will meet, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present." Marcus Aurelius
    • Found a site for the physical Temple :D (Last post by Corwinani)
    • Build a physical temple could be extremely useful, but without the special location could be just like any other building. But if we build the Jedi temple on a special place like a "WORLD GRID" of electromagnetic energy we could have extraordinary help with feeling the force and learning how to use and control the force. ( For Everybody who need to know more about world grid please watch Ancient aliens SEASON 3, episode 13 ) Force be with us
    • "The Interview" gets pulled (Last post by Adder)
    • True I guess, all the movies were the US President and family are hunted, kidnapped or killed are fake characters.
    • Hell Fire (Last post by Adder)
    • Both states as described above seem accessible while alive as experiences, perhaps only briefly, but I guess we'll never now if they exist as permanent strata's which some part of us join after death. I do notice they seem to conveniently represent the two polar extremes of physical existence, on one end a bliss so intense it tends to best compare almost as a type of fire, and on the other a pain so intense it dissolves ones very essence.... so I'm not sure it's anything more then a projection and fantasy from those who have tasted those extreme states of mind/spirit/body. Then again anything outside our capacity to experience might well be expected to be represented as those extremities - and need not mean they are not generated from something outside our sensory capacities. I guess an interesting question could be would you want to experience them both while alive, briefly, and why... what would you do with that knowledge!?
    • From time to time a poem (Last post by Silvermane)
    • Play in the river, Until the moon comes out. Lay in the grass, Snout to snout. A tail of strength, Shining so bold. Wrapped with another, Soft and reddish gold. True lovers forever, With tails so grand. The Otter of the River, And The Fox of the Land.
    • 2014 New Year's Force Realist Meditation Relay (Last post by Alethea Thompson)
    • Updated: OUR LIST SO FAR, STILL NEED HOURS COVERED. :) 31 DEC 2014 10-11AM UTC - 11-NOON UTC - NOON-1PM UTC - Chris Porter 1-2PM UTC - Jenna 2-3PM UTC - 3-4PM UTC - 4-5PM UTC - Silmerion 5-6PM UTC - 6-7PM UTC - 7-8PM UTC - Jacob 8-9PM UTC - Sinistra, Shlomit 9-10PM UTC - Simen 10-11PM UTC - 11-MIDNIGHT UTC - Jamie Easting 1 JAN 2014 MIDNIGHT-1AM UTC - Rick Laws 1-2AM UTC - 2-3AM UTC - 3-4AM UTC - 4-5AM UTC - Casper 5-6AM UTC - Lori 6-7AM UTC - 7-8AM UTC - 8-9AM UTC - 9-10AM UTC -
    • Rants far and wide (Last post by Kaverael)
    • Quote: I am frustrated... Coming out is not as simple as telling people you're gay, bisexual, pansexual; transgender, genderqueer, genderfluid, or whatever the case may be. Coming out is an entire process of the people around you coming to terms with the implications of their assumptions about you being incorrect. Coming out is the painful process of being misgendered, having people ask inappropriate questions, and several other microaggressions that make everyday interactions painful. For this and many other reasons, coming out is a really scary experience that isn't at all as simple as what most of the media portrayals make it out to be. Last night I was reduced to terrified ugly sobbing when I realized that my Christmas would be spent either quietly being misgendered and misnamed or in intense conversations with relatives about what it means to be trans and pansexual. I don't do well with being quiet about being misgendered, I usually (at the very least) do something passive-aggressive in response. I had hoped that my Christmas would be at least somewhat relaxing, that I would get a break from the stresses of work and school, but I'm only going to have to trade one kind of stress for another. And I feel like it's all my fault, like I'm ruining my family's Christmas by being this difficult black sheep of the family. I know my mother wanted so badly for me to go to Minnesota for Christmas, but I'm regretting ever agreeing to go. My mother just informed me last night that I'd be spending Christmas Eve with someone from Uganda and I'm afraid that I'm going to have to explain all kinds of things to him, but additionally that Christmas Day will be spent with a bunch of children ranging from the ages of 2-17 and I'm not emotionally or mentally prepared to try to explain all this stuff to children, much less their parents. If it weren't for the fact that I'm not the kind of person to break promises, because I don't know what I am if people can't trust my word, I would just miss the flight to Minneapolis and that would be the end of it. I have enough groceries to make it through Christmas week. It's too late for that though, I've made promises and built up expectations about my arrival, therefore I cannot back out now. I regret it and I should have known. My apprenticeship studies included a lesson of meditation and contemplation about family relations, the answer was within me all along. I've spent my whole life trying to please my parents and with this Christmas thing I tried to please them then too. I've made a huge mistake and now I'm going to pay for it. Jamie, It sounds like your family is really looking forward to seeing you, so maybe they will just be happy you showed up. If you don't want to talk about your situation, try changing the subject, like "I know you have questions, but Mom/Aunt Lucy/Uncle Bob/whomever, is not comfortable hearing this stuff, especially during the holidays. Maybe we can get to get together and discuss it some other time. Let's focus on why we are all really here; to spend time with the ones we love," and just move on. You are who you are, so be that person, it's not like you are a leper. Show up with a smile, and a good attitude. I think that the more you stress about it, the more others will feed off of that stress, in a negative way. MTFBWY -Rick

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