What's your hurry?

As I think about how quickly I've been moving through my studies here at the Temple, I sometimes relish the lesson in patience I receive when I struggle to accept the fact that I gain nothing by advancing any faster than the other Jedi. There's absolutely nothing I get in exchange for completing my studies. I could brag, but what would be the point? That'd sort of be a real jerk move and not my style anyhow.

In light of some comments both direct and in passing, I'd like to ask other members of the Temple with a particular emphasis on those who are Apprentice and below: do you feel as though you need to advance to be accepted? When will you feel you can stop? If we spend so much time worrying about "getting it done", can we really learn all that the material/our teaching masters have to offer us?

Maybe I'm just blowing smoke out my rear end, in which case I'll go see a doctor right away since I'm pretty sure that's not how anatomy is supposed to work... But in the off chance some part of this resonates with how you feel at the Temple, I'm curious to hear/read your thoughts.

I took 8 months off from my apprenticeship because I felt like I was pressuring myself into something I wasn't ready for.

For everything... blah blah blah, right?

To be honest, some people become Counselors overnight (like V did), and you just have to wonder sometimes. I don't want to talk about people who can't be here to defend/comment themselves... but, if you look at situations where people go through too quickly, it shows in the long run, even if they DO truly "get" the material.

I have been training at this site for three years! I'm still only an apprentice, even though I've completed seminary and college in that period, two really good accomplishments. I am sure that when they Council thinks I am ready, they will bestow Knighthood on me. I am sure people have been Apprentices longer than I have been. Some people have had more drama, some have had to work much harder. Then again, for some, this line of work comes very naturally. For me, it's hard. I'd much rather have a conversation about this stuff than do 'assignment write-ups'. So, it takes me longer. Then again, I've filled 18 pages worth of training notes in my Apprentice journal.

As to your accepted comment, no.

I've made myself a part of this website, whether you guys wanted me here or not! I engrained myself in the processes. I became an integral member of the clergy for a time, I got in good with the big boss (who's my training master), I participate in discussions and I message members all the time.

It's about initiative. Learn and work, make friends and solve problems, pray together, and laugh together, debate Mortose together, and envy one another. We share the blood and sweat here. Let it mingle, and you'll see that at the end of the day, all our blood is red.

Throughout my time here, people have expressed this same exact sentiment when I say that I'm not going "fast enough".

What those people fail to realize is that I'm not running a race with other Jedi. I'm running one with myself. I know me, I know my mind, I know the subject material, and I'm not advancing as fast as I should be given that information. It's frustrating to me, because it means I'm not working at my peak efficiency. Which, in turn, is frustrating because at peak efficiency is when I retain knowledge the best, assimilate ideas best, think critically best.

My irritation isn't a lack of patience. It's a disgruntlement with myself that I'm not going to learn as much as I could be because I'm learning it too slowly for it to stick. And 9/10ths of the time, it's my fault.

Ranking up isn't my goal. Much like Steamboat, however, I need to get through things at a more swift rate. Perhaps that's the water in me? The constant rush to the next phase of a river'so journey to the ocean. I've been in the community for years and hold three separate titles: Master, Knight and Apprentice. obviously if I were simply looking to rank up, I would only require my title at Force Academy. Instead I look to see where I can evolve and how I can help further evolve the Jedi Path through my personal evolution that I am gaining out of the three respective orders I have taken particular interests in (FA, ToTJO and the offline groups).

Sometimes you gain from patience, other times you learn to apply it only when necessary. Of all the Jedi in the community, I believe I may be the most impatient. A woman of action, needing to see the next thing carried forward. I am patience with people, but not tasks or events.

Jamie Stick wrote: do you feel as though you need to advance to be accepted? When will you feel you can stop? If we spend so much time worrying about "getting it done", can we really learn all that the material/our teaching masters have to offer us?

It took me three years to complete the IP, I was in no hurry and do not feel inclined to rush my apprenticeship for advancement and/or acceptance through advancement. I am not confident enough to take on apprenticeships as a teacher or guide as a Knight does. Nor am I necessarily concerned with my status here, although I do wish to stay on good terms with those I encounter here to foster reciprocal experiences of learning, debate or just the enjoyment of casual chatting or correspondence.

Worrying about getting it done will not result in learning, the same problem is in our modern education systems. You study hard and briefly on select topics just to regurgitate the information to pass a test. You can study with others or even take notes but you're usually just trying to memorize the information versus take it in and really understand it and it's relationship to whatever else. A lot of what goes on here is really on the individual and their personal journey and growth in my opinion, those who are truly into it will benefit from it rather quickly, rank and advancement aren't even considered. Those here for the rank, well, they'll still benefit on the surface I suppose but that's fine let us learn from them as well.

Either way is just fine.

Everybody here is on their own path.

Some rivers flow faster than others. Some run quite slow, and some rush ahead with ferver.

Both of them carry minerals and distribute it them along the land.

If you are a river that rushes, it is necessary for you. It matches your nature, and it should.

If you are a river that calmly floats, all the same.

I am a very calm river. My path does not rush me. I took an entire year on the IP, and that was not due to any hiatus either. Every lesson was one I chose to take my own personal time to digest offline, and integrate into my day to day life. Slowly, those lessons helped me evolve who I am. Now I am an apprentice. I have again taken my time thoroughly with it as that is how my own path runs.

Steam, I understand your frustration, even as we are different in how our paths run. If your river rushes, and does not seem to go far, maybe it is safe to say, there are obsticals in the way hindering its flow. So... what does Tao Te Ching say about soft things overcoming the hard things? Water slowly erodes rocks, especially ones within a rushing river do they not? Have patience my friend. Your path will carve itself at its own chosen pace.

Exactly
No worries
No judgement
Just be
Do

I am in no particular hurry, although I have worried that I was moving too slowly. I have even asked (via forum and PM) about how speed affects learning and advancement. In the end I realized that I'll get through it when I get through it. If I tried to alter my speed in any way I wouldn't get as much out of it and I wouldn't be being true to myself.

As long as I continue working, I am happy. Even when I do eventually become a Knight I can't imagine I'll stop working, that just isn't me.

Some members join and seem to steam through the IP; I'm not sure how much one learns at such a pace, but then I am not them. There are members who joined after me who are already ahead.. but from what I can see they deserve it.

I want to be a knight sometimes. IF it stuck all the time I probably would be. But I want to be good at my job, and a good father, and a good husband, and a good teacher andandandand etc etc...


Does that count?


I dunno...my subconscious keeps going "Wait...waaaaaait....wait for it..."


Until then...I'm Jedi.